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Welcome to We Are the Hansens, a podcast celebrating the unique,
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powerful bond between mothers and daughters. In each episode, we
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dive into the heart of this special relationship, exploring its highs, lows,
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and everything in between, from shared moments of laughter and
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joy to navigating challenges and growth. We'll discuss how mothers
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and daughters shape each other's lives in wigs only they can.
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Whether you're a mother, a daughter, or both, join.
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Us as we unravel the complexities of this one of
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a kind connection and the lessons it teaches us along
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the way. Let's get started, all right, everyone, So I'm
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diving into this a little bit because mother and sons
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versus mothers and daughters, there is a big difference in
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how relationships and bonds work with sons and daughters. So
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I Am going to do daughters tonight and then we
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will get started on the sons tomorrow, just because you know,
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I picked daughters for a reason because it's definitely a
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lot more emotion for daughters. So our communication style.
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For me and my daughters is I.
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Would say it often involves more emotional connection and verbal communication.
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We take on the roles more guiding as mothers, so
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like for my daughters, I try to show them. Responsibility
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is a big thing for us well for me to
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show my daughters, like how to take care of your home,
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and I want them to know that when they grow
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up and have a family of their own, I want
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them to know how to treat their spouse. I treat
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my husband very well so that my children can see
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how to treat their friends, family, husband. I want them
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to treat them good. I defend my spouse, my kids,
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and my family when they're not around to defend themselves.
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I'm going to tell you a couple stories I guess
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about my daughters. We had some issues with school. All
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my kids have had issues at school with other kids
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and teachers. I'm going to tell you it wasn't pleasant.
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My kids never wanted to get in trouble in school,
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so it was always they just didn't say anything when
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they were either getting picked on or a teacher was
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saying stuff that they didn't do, or they were being blamed.
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Madison always wore her heart on her sleeve. That girl
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would come home from school crying because a teacher had
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said something to her. I'm going to tell you this story.
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Madison went to school one day. She didn't feel really well.
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And mind you, she was the type of kid that
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didn't say much at school. She was real quiet. Her
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and her friends were just playing in the hall, giggling
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and kind of bumping each other back and forth. Another
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child went and told on her, and she got called
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to the principal's office. Well, the vice principal asked her
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why she was being a bully, didn't even ask her
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the story first, just asked her why she was being
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a bully because she got a report that my daughter
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was bullying another child. And my daughter started telling her
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that her and her friend were just playing in the hall,
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bumping each other back and forth, and she said, you
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know what, just zip your mouth, and she said she
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was just giving her a lashing about being a good
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friend and not a bully. And Madison was so upset
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because she's like, I was just playing with my friend.
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It wasn't I wasn't bullying her. Well, then I get
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the phone call from the assistant vice principal and she
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tells me that Madison had to be talked to today
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at school because she was bullying somebody. And I know
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my daughter well enough to know that my daughter doesn't bully.
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In fact, my daughter is the type of girl that
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will stick up for somebody being bullied because it's heartbreaking.
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She's been bullied in the past and she knows how
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it feels. So as this vice principal is telling me this,
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I said to her, are you sure that my daughter
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was the one? Because if my daughter was being considered
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a bully, there had to have been a reason why
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she defended herself, because I know she doesn't just pick fights.
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And she's like, no.
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I was told that she was bullying, and I said, well,
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she came home with a lanyard, her lanyard that she
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holds her key for her lock. On her locker, some
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little girl had wrote go kill yourself on it. She said,
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excuse me, And I said it's probably this is probably
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the girl that reported it or something. And she said, well,
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I'll have to do some digging. Madison was called down
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to the counselor's office, and the counselor knows us very well,
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and she told Madison, she's like, I know for a
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fact that you weren't bullying. It's very hard to believe.
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But is there anything you need to talk to me about?
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And Madison told her what was on our lanyard. It's
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stuff like that that. I'm a mama bear if things
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happen at school to my kids. I know my kids
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are not perfect. I know that for a fact. Nobody
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is perfect, not nobody. I won't ever let my kids
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or me claim to be perfect. But I know she
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wasn't bullying anybody. If anything, she was sticking up for
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somebody else, if that's what you know. But it was
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in the hallway, her and her friends were just playing around.
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It's stuff like that that, really, because if my kid's
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doing something wrong, yes they should be in trouble for it.
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But you better get your facts straight and you better
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check and ask everybody around before you go accusing my
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child of being a bully, because I know a lot
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of people at the school know my children and know
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they are not bullies. In fact, my daughter Morgan was
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in a group called Stand for the Silent, and that's
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a group where if you are getting bullied or teased
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at school, you can go to her or a member
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of the Stand for the Silent group and you can
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tell them and they will bring it to the attention
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of the people that need to be brought to the
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attention of they are for the people that don't have
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a voice to say what's happening. So that's a little
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bit of a thing that I wanted to share because
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I think it's important, you know, to show your children
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don't ever just take the blame and stuff like that
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from anybody. You know, you got to stand up and
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tell them. My kids have always been very quiet about that.
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They never wanted to say anything and just took the
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heat even though they weren't part of it. I just
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I've gotten to the point now where Madison, at the
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end of last school year, she was finally starting to
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stand up for herself because I tell my kids all
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the time, who cares what anybody thinks about you?
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Who cares?
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If somebody's gonna say bad things about you, let them
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say it. Who cares what they say? You know the
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truth period. I try and teach my kids how to cook,
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my girls because especially my girls, because I want them
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to know how to cook for their family when they
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get older. Cleaning is a big thing in my home.
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I am always cleaning, and I try and teach my
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kids that it's important to keep your home clean and
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presentable for if you ever have company or if somebody
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just shows up un announced, your house is going to
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be clean. And that's a big thing in our house.
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My kids, some of them tend to hate it. They
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do it because, you know, chores, got to do chores.
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And eventually, when you have kids, you're going to understand
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why your mom has always taught you make your kids
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help you clean. You're a team. Everybody should be cleaning
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in the home. So me and my husband are business owners,
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and my girls will come with and they help us
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do the work that we do.
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They love it.
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We've painted houses and we've cleaned houses, and we've done
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so much. We've powerwashed, and my girls are the first
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ones to say, can we go and help clean, can
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we go and help paint?
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Whatever it may be.
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My girls will hang with all of us just to
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be part of whatever job we're doing. They love to
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be there to help. I always tell my kids and
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my husband and my family that I love them. That
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is a big thing in our home as well, because
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showing somebody affection, hugging, giving them a kiss good night,
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giving them a kiss goodbye. We always do it. Our
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kids are in there. The oldest is thirty. Still to
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this day, none of our kids are embarrassed when they
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are out in public or with their friends or anything
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to say I.
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Love you mom or I love you dad. None of them.
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They even tell each other that our kids are pretty
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close bonding wise. They are a close group of kids. Yes,
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they fight and stuff, but they would be the first
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ones to be there if one of them got in trouble.
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The other kids would be there to back them up.
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I love that about our family because they never have
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to worry about anything because they're older brothers or older
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sisters or even the younger ones will be there to
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back them up. They don't care. The affection part. I
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want my kids to be able to show their spouse
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and their children the same affection as I show them.
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Like I said, I every night I tell my kids
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I love you. I give them a hug good night.
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I make sure they're all tucked into bed.
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You know, when one.
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Kid leaves for work or school or whatnot, they were
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always given a hug and they are always told I
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love you, Drive safe. I want to make sure that
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my kids know that I love them with all my heart.
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My girls, you know the emotional support my daughters tend
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to seek more emotional guidance and validation from me than
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my boys do. The emotional bond is often through our
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conversations we share. I give a lot of advice to
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my children and I support them, whether it be in
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their relationship. Picking what college Morgan's going to go to,
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you know, that is a big thing for her because
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she doesn't know what to do. She wants to do it.
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I think she seeks to see how I feel about it,
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and I know she wants to go far away to college.
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But she also worries about seeing us. You know, we've
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always been a real close family. So seeing your parents
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and your siblings every day or every few days as
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opposed to not seeing them for months at a time,
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that's a real big decision she has to make. So
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I'm glad that she chose to stay here because we
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would definitely miss her if she moved to another state.
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For sure, my daughters are more open about their feelings
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and concerns in our conversations, like personal matters, relationships, life experiences,
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stuff like that. My daughters, I'm sure most daughters to
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their mothers are that way. I mean, there are a
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select few of girls that maybe aren't so close with
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their mothers and or maybe their mother is not in
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the picture, but my children have that.
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You know.
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I have a sister that we don't really get along.
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She has said some very very hurtful things about my children.
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I try to not say anything, but it's really hard
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as a mother. So I'm the type of mom that
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if somebody says bad stuff about my children, I am
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the person that will attack her in words because you
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don't talk about my children, you barely know them. For one,
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You're making up lies to make my children look bad.
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And to be honest, my children are very very successful kids.
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My kids work, they get good grades in school. All
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of them have worked for everything they've got. They've been
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able to go and buy whatever they want because they
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worked their butt off to get that, and they deserve that.
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That is well deserved. We have stopped, We have cut.
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Off the negativity from that sister. We don't talk to her,
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we don't deal with her. We are just done. It's
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something you have to do in life because you don't
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want negative around your children. Obviously, they're going to get
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it living on their own and whatever.
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I hope that they take how.
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Touation and then they cut it off and they just
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break right there. They don't don't take it in any
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further because I want to want them to live out
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in the success.
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Around it always right down that. That is my show
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for night, guys.
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Tomorrow night, I'm going to get on to the Sun
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and mother time that bond between my son and sons
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and I. That is going to be tomorrow's show. I
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just wanted to let you guys know that my book
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is on l u l u dot com, Lulu dot com.
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You guys can go over there and check it out,
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send feedback if you like it. Let me know. I'm
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willing to do signed books for anybody that buys one.
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And you can reach us at we are the Hands
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and Show at or you can find us on Facebook
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at we are the Hansons. If you guys have any questions,
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you want to hear anything about our life, you got it.
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You can put it in there, Send me an email,
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send me in a Facebook message, and I will definitely
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try to get back to you or get it a
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show about that subject. I appreciate you all tuning in
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tonight and you guys all have a wonderful night