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Welcome to We are the Hands Ends. Today, we're diving
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into the topic that so many families face the challenges
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of maintaining long distance relationships with family members. Whether it's parents, siblings,
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or extended family, Saying connected across miles can be tough.
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Life gets busy, time zones get in the way, and
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sometimes distance can make relationships feel strange. We'll be sharing
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our own experiences, struggles, and what has worked for us
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in keeping our family close despite the miles. Distance is
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hard on family bonds, that is for sure. I'm gonna
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tell you. One of the biggest challenges is missing out
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on daily life, birthdays, holidays, and even the small everyday
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moments that make relationships feel strong. Most of our family
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is in Wisconsin. Time zones really aren't a thing for
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us because obviously they're on the same time zone as us,
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But it is really hard when your kids miss out
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on grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins. We do have some family
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in Illinois, and we do have some family in California,
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and we have some family in Arizona. Majority of our
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family is in Wisconsin. It gets really tough. My kids
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really miss out on being able to bond with their aunts,
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and uncles, cousins and grandparents, and I feel really bad
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for my kids because they have us, and they have
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their siblings, but they don't have anybody else. I mean,
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they have a couple cousins here, but that's about it.
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So it does get really sad seeing the kids, especially
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the little ones, questioning why they don't get to see
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their aunts and uncles, their grandparents, because that is a
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big thing. We want our kids to have a relationship
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with their aunts and uncles and grandparents, and it just
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seems very I don't know how to even say it.
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It's just really sad to see that, you know, we
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don't get to travel up there all the time, and
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they don't get to come here and see us all
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the time. My kids don't have that bond that I
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wish they had with their grandparents and their aunts and
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uncles and cousins. They're kind of stuck with their siblings.
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So that is a big thing we miss out on
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so much with our family being far away. I have
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struggled with it for a long time, just because my
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kids always ask, well, how come we don't get to
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see Grandma and Grandpa or our aunts and uncles and cousins.
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Very stressful. And I know that you can call them
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on the phone or video them, but it's not the same.
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You can't go call them up and say, hey, let's
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go to the movies, or hey let's go roller skating,
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or hey, you want to go to the beach. It's
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not easy. Most of the time, we try and get
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togethers for like Christmas or you know, a family Thanksgiving
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after or before Thanksgiving. This year, it just didn't happen,
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and it was really hard on my kids. I think
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it's very important for kids to have aunts and uncles
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and cousins and grandparents, especially grandparents. Had my grandparents and
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Jeremy had his grandparents, so it does mean a lot
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to kids, and it's really sad when there's nothing like that.
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And I know, time and money and stuff like that,
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it just it's hard. But I have made it a
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goal for this year twenty twenty five to make sure
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that my kids are able to visit their cousins and
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grandparents and aunts and uncles, because that is important to
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them and they have expressed that to me. So I
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am going to to try my best to make sure
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that they are able to be able to see their
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aunts and uncles, and cousins and grandparents feeling disconnected or
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even forgotten sometimes has always been a thing for my kids.
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They will hear about grandma and grandpa going to cousin's house,
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or aunts and uncles going to cousin's house, or aunts
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and uncles being at grandma's house, and they want to
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do that too, but it just doesn't happen. So I
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know how they feel, and it's very heartbreaking sometimes not
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being able to visit as often as you'd like, especially
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when family members are older and go through life challenges.
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It's just it's very hard. My sadness and my husband's
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sadness is seeing the kids grow up without their long
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distance relatives being as involved as we would like them
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to be. It's not easy, guys, it's not easy at all.
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And sometimes to the kids, it's crushing. And then you
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see your kids being crushed and you feel I wouldn't
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say failed as a parent, but you wish you could
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do more. You wish you could take that away. So
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I try and get my kids to make contact with
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all family members. It's very difficult because the older ones, especially,
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they do a lot, they work, go to school. You know,
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they got their own life. Even though they want to
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talk to them other family members. Sometimes, as my older
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kids have expressed, is it's hard to talk to somebody
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when you don't really know them. You know them, you
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know that they're your family, but you don't know them
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enough to carry on a full blowng conversation. I know
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it sounds bad, but that's the truth. And when you
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don't see someone for a long time, you just it's
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hard to communicate with them, you know, picking up the
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phone to call them, you just don't know what to say.
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You don't know them as well. So that's tough. And
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I know my kids would like to be able to
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see them and talk to them more. But like I said, again,
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life happens. Life gets in the way, and when you're
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super busy, and I mean, the road goes both ways.
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And I've always got after my mom and dad, you know,
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because they can pick up a phone and they could
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call the kids, and it just doesn't happen very often.
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And I always tell my kids, you know, I'm sorry.
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I don't know what else to say to them. So
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some of the ways we make contact is obviously calling.
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We try to video chat. Not everybody can video chat
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or FaceTime, so it gets tough. Video calls Facebook calls
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have been our thing that helps a lot. My parents
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are older and they don't drive very much anymore, so
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that becomes challenging because now it's to the point where
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if we want to see them, we need to go there,
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because unless they're getting a ride to see us, it
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ain't happening. I mean, health in your parents as they
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get older starts to decline. Not everyone's health is great,
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so it's tough. It can be hard when one side
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feels like they're making more effort than the other. And
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I've seen it firsthand, and so have my children, and
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that gets to be a very tough and sticky situation.
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Sometimes distance isn't really the barrier, even though you think
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it is. It's not. Sometimes it's just everybody's busy with
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work and other things that they just don't have time.
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And I feel it's really important that you make time.
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Whether you're working or whatnot. You need to make time
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to see your family because when it's your time to
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go home, you can ever make memories. Ever. Again, So
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when I say make time for your family, whether it's
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long distance or not, make time, because once they go home,
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that's it. I know me and my husband have had
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a lot of regrets with Grandma Darlene, and once she
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passed away, you regret a lot of things that you
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didn't do. So while long distance relationships can be difficult
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and challenging, they're not impossible. It takes effort from both sides.
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But make sure you keep those bonds strong with your
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children and you and your long distance family. It's very important.
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I can't stress it enough because there are times that
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I sit there after one of my younger kids has said,
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how come we don't get to see our grandparents because
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they see their friends seeing their grandparents, or how come
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we don't get to see our aunts and uncles. Make time,
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do whatever you got to do, and make sure you
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either travel there or you say something to them family members,
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because you aren't here forever, and once you're gone, you're gone.
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When it's your time and God calls you home, you're
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gone and you can never remake those memories. So as
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for being able to see family long distance, like I
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said twenty twenty five, my kids are going to be
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able to see their family who's far away, because I
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want them to know that, regardless of how long distance
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it is, you know. I know the road goes both
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ways and so does the phone. But if I can
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help in any way to make sure my kids are
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happy and they are able to see their family far away,
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I'm going to do it for my kids. I'm going
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to end this off by telling you guys that you
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need to cherish your loved ones near and far regardless,
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and we want to hear from you and how you
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stayed connected with long distance family members if you had
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any Thanks for tuning in to We Are the Hansens.
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If you'd enjoyed this episode, don't forget to go over
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to our YouTube channel We are the Hansens and subscribe.
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We are the Hansens or send us an email We
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are the Hansens Show at gmail dot com. Until next
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time