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Welcome back to We are the Hansens. Today we're diving
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into what it's like to raise kids who are incredibly
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close in age, our two sons who are just thirteen
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months apart, and our youngest daughters with an even tighter
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gap of eleven months.
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If you've ever wondered one life with virtual.
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Twins is like or if you're in the thick of
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it yourself, this month's for you. So early days for
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us with close age gaps. Let's be honest, those first
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few years are pure chaos. Now, I'm telling you it
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was chaos for us when my second son was born.
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My first was just starting to walk, two sets of diapers,
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double the mess, and minimal sleep. It felt like the
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baby face never ended. Then came our youngest two daughters,
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and I thought, I've done this before.
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How hard could this be? Well it was harder than
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I thought. One because I had one toddler at home
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with my two daughters and one in the nick You,
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and we were in the nick you so long.
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It was eighty six days. Everyone.
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It was a struggle, bouncing from home to the hospital.
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It was a nightmare.
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But I'm going to start off with my boys because
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they were my first close in age. They were double trouble.
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You know, the adjusting part of having kids at close
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in age.
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It's tough, it is.
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It tested my patience and it tested our teamwork between
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my husband and I and our sanity.
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I mean, two.
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Kids crying at the same time.
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It was rough.
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It was rough, but we also learned to work together
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better than ever because when one is crying for something,
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and usually it wasn't the same thing they were crying for.
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One probably needed a diaper and one was hungry or
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vice versa. There's always something else that could be wrong,
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maybe one sick.
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It just depended.
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And me and my husband were a good team just
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having to work together with two babies real close in age.
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They both needed our attention. You become a stronger team,
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stronger team when you have to deal with two babies
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at one time. That's pretty much what we dealt with,
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And it was like having twins, except for one kuld
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walk and one couldn't. So we always work together. If
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we were home together, we worked together. If one had
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to work and one was home, it was tough, but
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we made it through.
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Usually the baby would.
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Be sleeping while the other one was up running around
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I would always try to get them on the same
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sleeping schedule so they were both sleeping at the same time. Granted,
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a lot of times it was hard to do because
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you know, when you have a toddler, they usually don't
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want to go to sleep, They want to play. They
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want to be up and moving around and getting into things.
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For my boys, it was a little difficult. My first
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setted kids that were really close in age. And nobody
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gives you a book on how to be a parent.
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There is no book, nothing. You learn as you go,
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You learn from seeing other people do it, You learn
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from your family. It is a learning curve when you
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have children and you're a I wasn't a first time
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mom because I was a first time mom at eighteen,
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but I still did not know everything when I had
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my second boy or my third boy, and because they
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were so close, I was feeling like I was raising
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twins even though they weren't twins. Our son Gavin, when
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he was a baby, he had what they call a
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multi sistic kidney, so we were in and out of
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the doctors a lot with him, and just having to
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go to the doctors with two kids so close in age,
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it was hard, very hectic, but we did it. We
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managed to take all the kids with us to the
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doctor's office and deal with it. As a parent, you
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have to do what you gotta do. And most of
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the time, the doctors and the nurses they understand. You know.
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People always would look at us or ask us questions.
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You know, you just deal with it whatever is asked.
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You can be honest. People might not like your honesty,
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but it's tough. It's tough having two kids close in age.
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With the girls, it was tough, like I said, because
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one was at home and one was in the NICU.
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So me and Jeremy had to be gone and awful
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lot back and forth to the hospital. We weren't sure
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if Anna was gonna make it through, and she's our youngest.
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She was the one that was born so early, so
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we were at the hospital a lot lot. And even
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though I felt like I was neglecting my children at home,
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I knew eventually my baby would be coming home with us.
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It was just time, and I feel like I missed
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out on a lot of time with my other kids
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while I was in the hospital. But I feel like
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it also made us stronger as a family, because your
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other kids know what you're going through. They feel your emotions,
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and they're very compassionate. At least my children were. My
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children were very compassionate and understanding, and they helped out
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a lot. I'm really, really, really proud of every one
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of them for helping out at home, making sure the
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house is clean, making sure the little ones get fed,
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because I could not always be there, nor could Jeremy.
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And I'm glad that we had other family that came
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to help out, to sisters, aunts, you know, stuff like that.
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Because it showed.
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My children that they were cared about. You know, a
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lot of times kids, you know, if you don't have
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family that would come and give up their own time
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to help in a situation. That is the situation we
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were in where we were on pins and needles, not
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knowing if we were going to ever be able to
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bring our baby home, if we were going to have
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to bury our baby. We had no idea and we
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were left in the unknown. So with them two girls
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being so close in age, only eleven months apart, it
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was tough. I felt like when I was in the
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hospital all that time with a broken water that my
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little Torren didn't remember who I was, even though Jeremy
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brought them to the hospital all the time. She was
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my baby, you know, and so having another baby and
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so close in age, it was hard because I still
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had a baby at home and I was so sad
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that I had to leave her because I was stuck
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in the hospital and I wasn't there to put her
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to bed at night and just to be there. I
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missed out seeing her take her first steps. And I
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feel like I missed out on a lot of Torn's
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life when I was in the hospital, but I still
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got to see.
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Her, you know.
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It wasn't ever every day because we lived an hour
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a little over an hour from the hospital, but I
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missed out as well. So it was rough for me.
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But I made it through and were stronger than ever. No,
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so having kids close in age is definitely not a joke.
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Some of the unique bonds between the two sets of
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close siblings. I've always wanted to look back and see
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their bonds because as they were growing up, my boys
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they were really close. They fought a lot, but they
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were also best friends. They did everything together. They played
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outside together, they built forts together, they climbed trees together,
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they played Hide and go Seek together, and always wanted
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to hide together. They had a very strong bond. And
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seeing them today at seventeen and eighteen, I sit here
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and I'm like, hmm, my boys still have that bond.
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They do almost everything together still to this day. And
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I know all our kids are super close and they
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always hang out together and do things together. If you've
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seen my kids out and about all of them together,
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you would never know that they were siblings. If you
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didn't know them, you would think that they were all friends.
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And if they didn't all look similar and looks, you
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would think they were all best friends. Because that's how
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close our children are. My two boys, they work on
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their cars together, they go to the mall together. I mean,
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they do a lot of stuff together. Still, I'm super
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proud of them because both of them have worked at
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McDonald's and they held that job for a long time.
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They have both bought multiple vehicles working at McDonald's and
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now the only thing that has changed in them is
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what they want to do for work. Tristan he likes
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to build things. He works very hard. He has worked
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building grain bins and now he is working doing wood flooring.
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So they the company Tristan works for, they make wood
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flooring for your home. Gavin, on the other hand, he
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works in a restaurant as a busser. So Gavin, eventually
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when he graduates this may he wants to either do
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construction work or.
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He wants to go be alignment.
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So each of them have a little different outlook on
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what they want to do as far as work in life.
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Gavin is more my type of kid. That he's my
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trouble kid. Let's put it that way. That boy, he
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likes to drive fast, act crazy, have fun. He's more outgoing.
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I guess I could say Tristan is more laid back.
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He doesn't say a lot when they're out and about,
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you know, he's very quiet. He he doesn't just strike
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up a conversation with anybody. He lets them, you know,
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do most of the talking. He's more introvert. Maybe I
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don't really know. He's just not not as crazy Gavin.
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He talks to anybody. He doesn't care, He'll just talk.
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I guess he's more like me maybe than anything. Gavin
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is so but it's the most beautiful thing raising kids
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so close in age and seeing their bond it's almost
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like they're inseparable. At most points. They do fight definitely
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fight like siblings. But if anybody said anything bad about Tristan,
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Gavin was always there to back him up. And I'm
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going to tell you a little story. So my boys
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were at the park one time and there's some older
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kids there, and the one kid had flicked a cigarette
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at my son, Gavin, and it hit him in his arm.
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And.
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It infuriated Tristan to the point Tristan grabbed this kid,
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threw him to the ground and said, don't you ever
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do that to my brother again, or put your hands
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on my brother, he said, because next time it won't
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be so pretty.
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That is how my boys are.
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Gavin, on the other hand, somebody at school one time
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when Tristan was still in school was saying some pretty
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hurtful stuff about Tristan, and Gavin pretty much took care
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of that situation. It infuriated Gavin and he put an
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end to it real quick.
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So my boys are like that.
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All of my kids, I should say, are like that,
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because they will all stick up for one another regardless.
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You never say anything bad about somebody's sibling in front
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of them, because you're supposed to stand up for your siblings.
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So my boys do, my girls do. As well.
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We have a little bit of rivalry in our kids.
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When milestones are only months apart. It's like learning to
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walk or talk. There's temptation to compare, you know. Gavin
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would always pick on Tristan and say, oh, I walked
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before you were. He just picked It wasn't true. He
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was just teasing them because of how close an age
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they are. But we had to remind them that every
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child progresses in their own pace. Not every kid has
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a toothfall out and one grows back in before the other.
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Sometimes Gavin would lose a tooth before Tristan. Sometimes Tristan
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would lose the tooth before Gavin. Sometimes Gavin had bigger
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feet than Tristan.
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It just depended.
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Everything was different about them, even though they were so
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much alike. So that is some of the stuff. Now.
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Torn and Anna, which are our two youngest daughters, they
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are only eleven months apart, so their clothing they pretty
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much shared clothes and they still do to this day.
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Anna it definitely is a little bit bigger than Torn
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weight wise, but shoes, clothes, everything that Torn wears, Anna
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can wear, everything that Anna wears Torn can wear. So
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there's so much stuff that they have that is similar
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as well. They fight a lot, but they like a
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lot of the same stuff. So if you know, when
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Christmas time comes around or birthday stuff, they usually ask
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for almost the exact same stuff, but different colors. Gavin
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and Tristan they are similar to except for Gavin likes
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a little bit different style than Tristan. Tristan has kind
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of turned country and he likes the cowboy country western,
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where as Gavin likes the new hip hop today's style
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in boys clothes and stuff, So they're just a little
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bit different in that sense. They do like different colors.
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Tristan likes orange, Gavin he wears a lot of black.
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He likes blues too, so they're different in that sense.