Jan. 20, 2025

We Are The Hansons Our Home Where All The Kids Friends Hang Out

We Are The Hansons Our Home Where All The Kids Friends Hang Out

In this episode, we dive into the joy and occasional chaos of creating a home that feels welcoming to not only our kids but also their friends. We'll share how we prioritize making our space fun, safe, and inviting while still maintaining our family values and expectations. From setting boundries to stocking snacks and planning activities, we'll talk about the balance of being the go-yo house while keeping our sanity in a big family. Tune in for stories, tips, and the reasons why we wouldn't have it any other way!

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Welcome to We are the Hansens. I'm Maya Hansen, and

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this is the show where we share all about our

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big family, the chaos, the love, and the lessons we're

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learning along the way.

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Today we're talking.

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About something that's become really important to us over the years,

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creating a home where all our kids.

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Friends want to hang out.

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If you've ever wondered how to make your house the

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go to spot for your kids and their friends, or

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why you'd even want.

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To, We've got plenty to share. Let's dive in.

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So our home has always been the hangout spot for

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our kids and their friends, and I am so thankful,

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and I'm going to tell you a little bit about

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why it is important to us as the parents to

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have our home be the place where kids want to

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gather and talk about the benefits. I'm going to start

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by sharing it's really important to us because we know

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where our kids are. We know our kids are safe,

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and we know other kids are safe, and we know

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that nobody is going to be doing something that they

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should not be doing. It has always been a big

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thing to me to know where my kids are to

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make sure they are safe and they have plenty of

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stuff to eat. I just like to know that my

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kids are taking care of it, and I would expect

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that from somebody else's parents as well. You know, other

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parents some just don't really care. And I'm the type

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of parent that as long as I know my kids

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are safe and they're fed and they're warm, I feel

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a lot better. And I hope that other parents would

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do the same if my kids were at their home.

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It helps by building trust and relationships. When our kids

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bring their friends over, we get to know who they're

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spending their time with. We see their dynamics, their personalities,

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and honestly, we just love getting to know the kids

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who are shaping our children's world.

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I mean, to know that your.

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Kids are hanging out with good kids is almost a relief.

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And I want my kids to have good friends and

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safe friends, friends that aren't getting into trouble or doing drugs.

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And I'm going to tell you all of my kids

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as friends. I think there's only been one friend, maybe two,

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that I really didn't like too much because always wanting

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to drink, always wanting to smoke, always wanting to do drugs.

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It wasn't great and my kids ended up weaning him

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out of the friendship circle. Because of that, I also

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see how my kids interact with their friends and how

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their friends interact in our home, and it's helped build trust.

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I can let my kids go to a party with

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a friend or go hang out, and I know my

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kids will make the right decisions. I know that my

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kids would say no to peer pressure. I know how

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my kids are. I've instilled, and so has Jeremy, my husband,

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into our kids, that if you ever go to a

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party with your friends and there is drinking there, you,

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for one, do not get in the car with anybody

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who's been drinking or driving, And you especially do not

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get in the car and drive drunk. That is one

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thing that I've pushed and so has Jeremy, my husband,

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to make sure our kids never make that mistake. And

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I'm going to tell you my kids know if they

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go to a family member's house or their cousins, you know,

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just wherever, they better not get behind the wheel. If

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they want to leave, they know how to pick up

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a phone and call me, my husband, or an older

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sibling to get them home safe. Because I do not care.

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I might be mad at them for drinking or whatever

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for a little while, but I know it's bound to happen,

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and I'd rather them call me and wake me up

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out of bed to come and get them wherever they're

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at than to get behind a wheel and put other

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lives at risk or their self at risk. That's a

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no no, and my kids know that is a no no.

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I'd like to be able to keep an eye on

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things as a parent. It's comforting to know our kids

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are safe, supervised in an environment where we can keep

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our eye on them and what's going on, but not

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be a helicopter parent, not hover over our kids. My

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kids are very trustworthy kids, and they would never put

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somebody else at risk. And they are the type of

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kids if they go to a party or anything, they're

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the type of kids that will take their friend's keys

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and hide them so their friends don't do something stupid.

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So that's how we've raised our children, and I'm very

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proud of every single one of them because of that reason.

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Some of the best memories for our kids have been

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the nights they've spent laughing and hanging out with their

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friends at our home, and we want to be part

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of that. We get involved, we play games, we have

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a movie night, we maybe have music and just let

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the kids dance. We enjoy that. That is something that

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I will cherish forever, and I know my kids will

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remember those things and them memories that we created.

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We like to create a.

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Space for them, meaning we open up our living room

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for movie nights, or we put like a strobe light

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on the ceiling, you know, just fancy lights so that

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the kids can dance.

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Our movie nights are a big thing.

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We get popcorn, and we get snacks, and usually I

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make a good dinner before the movie starts, so we

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all eat and just relax.

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It's fun. The kids enjoy it.

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We all gather around a table and we play games,

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whether it be board games or card games or charades

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or whatever it may be. And it is so fun

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because all of my kids, as friends say, we are

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the cool parents. We don't need to have drinking or

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drugs or any of that or these kids to want

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to be around us, and I love it. I love it.

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Me and my husband are not drinkers or drug addicts.

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And I want these other children that are coming to

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my home to see you can have fun without all

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that nasty stuff. I think us being role models like

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that will help guide some kids in the right direction,

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at least I hope it will. Even just hanging out

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chatting stuff like that, it makes a big difference. The

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kids still have fun. I will go to the store

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if I know that there's a large group of kids

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coming over. I make it a point to go to

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the store and pick up all kinds of snacks, you know, drinks,

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whether it's chips and cookies or fruits, whatever it may be.

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Lots of popcorn, lots of bottled water, lots of soda.

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I make sure I get all of that, because the

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small things make a big difference. We want our home

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to feel like a place where everyone can just be themselves.

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That means keeping the atmosphere light, warm and welcoming. We

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greet our kids as friends, like they're our own. Most

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of the friends that come here we know their names,

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just because they've been our kids as friends for a

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long time. Every now and then we will get a newcomer,

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and all of the kids as friends say their parents

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are awesome. I don't sit there and yell at my kids.

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I want my kids to be able to bring their

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friends here and feel like they have a space that

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they can enjoy. And that's just the bottom line right there,

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and that's why our house is always full of a

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bunch of kids besides ours. We don't care about the noise.

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We have dealt with noise for a very long time.

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Having thirteen kids is a lot of noise, and then

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you add their friends makes it funner. And let's be honest,

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when you're in a house where all the kids hang out,

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it's not going to be quiet at all. But we've

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learned to embrace the noise and see it as a

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sign of life, laughter, and connection. That is how we

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feel it's worth a little mess and chaos to know

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our kids and their friends are safe and happy and

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enjoying themselves. There are some boundaries that it's just a

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normal thing. We try to keep things level.

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No fighting.

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You know that many kids around there can be arguments.

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What's okay for our kids is okay for their friends.

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We've always made sure that everyone knows the basics. No

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getting too rough while rough housing in you know certain areas,

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or cleaning up before you leave. You don't have to

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make my house shiny clean, but make sure you take

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your trash out, your dishes out, stuff like that. I

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don't expect their friends to do my dishes. I don't

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expect them to mop my floors or sweep or anything

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like that. Just pick up what you mess. That's all

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I have for them. We also talk to our kids

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about how to make their friends feel more welcome and included.

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And most of their friends know that. You know.

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I always tell them, if you guys are hungry or thirsty,

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help yourself. There is plenty of food and snacks to

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go around. Help yourself. Don't be scared to ask, just

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get up and do it. And the payoff of being

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the hangout house for us.

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Is the kids being.

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Able to gather and not feel like they're being spied

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on or.

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Just they can be theirself.

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There are times when it feels like revolving door or

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like our grocery bill has doubled overnight, but the rewards

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are huge, guys, They're huge. We're building relationships with our

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kids and their friends and creating sense of community and

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giving them a safe space where they feel loved and supported.

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It's very important for kids to feel that, very very

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important for a kid to feel that. Plus we see

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how this has helped our kids build confidence and learn

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how to be good friends. They've also seen the value

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in kindness and hospitality, which we hope they'll carry.

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Into their own lives as they grow up.

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I want my kids as friends, even if they don't

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come from a very well home. I want their friend,

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whoever that may be, to know that they always can

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come here. Whether they don't have food, I will open

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my doors to them. I don't ever want to see

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a child go hungry, ever, And I've brought many kids

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into my home to make sure that they are loved,

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cared for, and to know that if they ever needed

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somebody to talk to, me and my husband would always

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open our hearts and our ears to listen.

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They may not like our advice, but.

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You know, we've had many kids come to us asking

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for advice on what to do, and they've taken our

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advice and they've used it, and they'll come back around

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and they'll be like, you know, when you told me

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to go talk to my dad, you led me in

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the right path, and I want to thank you for that.

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And we're always like, you don't ever have to thank

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us for any of that. That is what parents are

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supposed to do. And I think that's why a lot

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of our kids as friends like to come and hang

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out here. We are considered the cool parents, and to

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be honest, I don't think I'm that cool. I don't

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think my husband's that cool. But just them knowing that

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they have a place to go and just be themselves

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with no judgment. I think that helps. I honestly think

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that helps. And it makes me laugh because I listen

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to them and they talk to me like I'm one

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of their friends most of the time, and I just

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try and show them that not all things have to

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be a bad setting. You know, I don't want them

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to be in a bad setting. I want them to

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also know, as I tell all of them my kids

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and their friends, even if my kids aren't at a

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party and you end up at a party and you

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are wanting to leave, call I will take you home

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and drop you off. I will make sure you are safe.

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And I sure hope one day if they encounter a

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situation like that that they will call. If they're too

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scared to call their parents themselves, they can call me,

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because I would drop everything to make sure any child

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is safe, because I know, deep down in my heart

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there are other parents out there like me that would

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do the same for my children if that ever did happen.

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I know quite a few parents that would do it

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for my kids. So just being that parent parents helps

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helps a lot, and I want them to carry it

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on to their children as well.

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So I am going to end this.

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By saying, that's how we made our home the hub

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for our kids and their friends. If you're thinking about

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doing the same, start small, maybe with a game night,

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or a pizza party, or even just a movie, and

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see how it grows from there. You don't need a

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perfect home or a huge budget to create welcoming space.

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We don't have a huge home, but we always make space.

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All you need is love, a little creativity, and a

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willingness to embrace chaos, because I'm going to tell you

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it does get chaotic. Thanks for listening to this episode

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of We Are the Hansens. Go subscribe to our YouTube

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channel we Are the Hansens.

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Go.

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Send us a message on we Are the Hanson's Facebook

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page if you have anything you'd like to ask us,

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or you can send us an email at we Are

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thee Hansens Show at gmail dot com.

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See you next time.