Feb. 16, 2025
We Are The Hansons Making Sure Our Kids Have What They Need Growing Up
We dive into what it truly means to make sure our kids have everything they need growing up. It's not just about clothes, food, and shelter-it's about emotional support, stability, and the tools they need to thrive in life. We share how we balance needs vs. wants, how we create a secure a loving environment, and why teaching responsibility is just as important as providing for them. Parenting is a journey, and we're her to talk about the real, everyday challenges and joys of raising a big family.
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Welcome back to We are the Hands, and today we're
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diving into a topic that is at the heart of parenting,
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making sure can have everything they need growing up. And no,
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we're not just talking about the material things, so those
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are important too, we mean emotional, mental, and physical needs,
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the things that truly shape them into healthy, happy.
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And well rounded people.
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As parents of thirteen kids, we've had to learn a
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lot about balancing needs, prioritizing what really matters, and figuring
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out how to give each child what they need without
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losing ourselves in the process. It's the journey and we're
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still learning. So today we'll cover basic necessities Verse one,
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emotional needs, the important of stability and consistency, opportunities for growth,
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and how.
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We teach responsibility. Let's jump in so basic needs verse once.
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In our home, we all want to give our kids
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the world, but reality doesn't always allow that, and honestly,
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giving kids everything they want isn't always what's best for them,
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let's face it. In our house, we make sure every
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child has a safe place to live, nutritionous foods to eat,
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clothing that fits them and makes them feel good, school
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supplies and access to learning material else and healthcare and
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wellness support. When it comes to once, we try to
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teach gratitude and appreciation. Our kids know that just because
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they want something doesn't mean they're going to get it
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right away. All of our kids know that because money
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is tight when you have thirteen kids, we encourage them
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to work for extras, save up for the things that
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they really want, and understand the difference between needs and wants.
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I mean, it's simple, guys. Sometimes it can be difficult,
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you know, because kids don't always understand. We've had moments
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where one of the kids has really wanted the latest
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gadget meaning PS five, you know whatever, or a brand new,
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brand name pair of shoes. We've used these opportunities to
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talk about budgeting, making choices, and understanding value. Sometimes we
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say yes, sometimes we say no, and sometimes we help
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them figure out a way to earn it themselves. Obviously,
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kids need shoes, they need clothes, they need all kinds
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of stuff. But as a parent of thirteen, you want
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your kids to have name brand stuff because schools kids
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are mean and they'll eventually get bullied, you know, if
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they don't have the name brand stuff. And it's sad
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to say that because it shouldn't be like that, but
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it is and it's horrible. So obviously we make sure
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our kids have shoes, clothes, whatever they need. When it
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comes to like the newest name brand shoe and let's
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say it's one hundred and fifty dollars, my kids are
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going to work for that. This balance is key in
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helping them grow into responsible, financially aware adults. I mean,
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who doesn't want their kids to know that stuff. Meeting
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physical needs is one thing, but emotional needs that takes
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daily effort. In a big family, it's easy for the
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child to feel lost in the mix if we're not
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intentional about giving them time and attention. So here's what
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our family focuses on. We focus on one on one time,
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especially with the older kids. You'll go with them someplace,
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or maybe sit down at nighttime and have a chat
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with them, or a walk around the block. Individual attention
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makes a huge difference for the little kids. It's sitting
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down with them, especially at dinner time they like to
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be heard and reading a bedtime story to them, or
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just having a conversation with them just to make them
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feel that they're being seen and heard. Sometimes kids just
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need to be heard, even when their problems seems small
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to us, they are big to them. We make sure
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they know their voices matter, affirmation and encouragement. It's easy
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to correct behavior, but we also try to point out
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to them the good we see in them. Hard work, kindness, creativity.
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Them are things that our kids need to know, and
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it couldn't come from somebody better than a parent. Life
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isn't always fair, and we don't shield our kids from that. Instead,
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we teach them how to handle disappointments, setbacks, and struggles.
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They need to know that, they need to know how
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to handle that stuff. Our kids also know that home
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is a place where they can be themselves without fear
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of any rejection. We've seen firsthand that when a child's
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emotional needs are met, they're more confident, kinder to others,
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and better able to handle life's challenges. I've seen it
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with every single one of our children. You know, I
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couldn't be prouder to say that every one of our
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kids handles situations different, but they handle it very well.
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You know.
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Providing stability and consistency is a big deal for our kids.
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Even in the craziness of our big family, we work
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hard to maintain structure and consistency. Some things that provide
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stability in our home are routines, from bedtime to family meals.
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Them are important and they make our kids more secure.
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They know that family values, what we stand for and
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what is expected of them. That is very important as well.
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We have an open communication in our home. We talk
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things through so they aren't left guessing trying to figure
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out what they're looking for. That's a good thing. And
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then we also have faith and morals. This gives them
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a foundation to stand on when you know, life gets tough.
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Even when life throws curveballs like unexpected expenses or job
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changes or health struggles. We show our kids how to
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handle uncertainty with faith and resilience. I see it every
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day with my children and how they're handling things. That
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is a big thing for us. Giving our kids the
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opportunity to grow. While we focus on their immediate needs,
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we also think long term. We want our kids to
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have opportunities to explore, to grow and develop into their
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best selves. Encouraging their interest, whether it's in sports, art,
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you know, whatever it may be. We help them develop
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their passions, teaching life skills from cooking, budgeting to fixing
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things around home. They learn to be self sufficient. And
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every single one of our kids know that. From the
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thirty year old all the way down to the seven
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year old, every one of them know that. You know,
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they've all jumped in to help with different things, whether
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it be helping cook dinner, taking out trash, you know,
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whatever it may be, they are always We're always teaching
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them something new, pushing them to step outside their comfort zone.
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You know that growth doesn't happen in a bubble. We
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encourage our kids to try new things, even when they
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are scared. It's important to step out of your comfort zone,
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to try something new because then you know, it just
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opens you up for bigger and better and it makes
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the child feel good regardless of what it is. And
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then we also teach our kids to dream. We want
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them to believe they can do big things, but also
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that it takes hard work and dedication to get there.
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One thing we remind our kids often we'll give them
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all the tools they need, but what they do with
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them is up to them. And we've had to do
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it a lot, but they ran with it and it's
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amazing to see that, every one of them. A big
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part of making sure our kids have what they need.
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Isn't just about giving. It's also about teaching them to
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take care of themselves. Chores everyone pitches in, no one
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is exempt. That's a family team thing, and our kids
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know that we don't rush into fix everything. Learning from
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mistakes is very powerful, and every one of our kids
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have learned from their mistakes, and me and my husband
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just sit back and watch it with our own eyes
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and we see them fix it on their own. So
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that makes us feel good as parents. Teaching financial responsibility
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from saving birthday money tooth fairy money, you know, their
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first job, whatever they get money for or whether it
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be you know, helping out in the yard, they learn
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to manage their own money. And now the younger two,
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they like to spend their money quick, and I'm always
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telling them save, save, saved, because you're gonna want something
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better and it's gonna cost more money and you aren't
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gonna have that money. You need to save it. Instead
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of fixing their problems, we encourage problem solving. We ask
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what do you think you should do? Because that's a
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question that's gonna make them think of should I do
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it or shouldn't I. So that's another thing. When our
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kids leave the house. We want them to know how
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to function in the real world. That means balancing freedom
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with responsibility, knowing when to ask for help, and having
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the confidence to tackle challenges head on. And I have
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no issues watching my kids make mistakes or fail at
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something that isn't going to hurt them, but they're going
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to learn from it. And as I watch all our
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kids go through life from the time they're little until now,
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each one of them has fixed things along their journey.
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Money has never been an issue for our older kids
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when it comes to saving, because they know that nothing
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is free in life. You always have to sacrifice some things,
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whether it be well, I got to pay this bill,
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so I don't have money for that. Maybe you wanna
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redo your car and you just don't have the money,
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so you do little things at first. Maybe you're gonna
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buy new seat covers one day, and then next time
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you get paid, you're gonna do the breaks. Or you
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got to make sure they're setting their priorities where they
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need to go. The brakes come first, and then all
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the little extras come in. I've seen my kids make
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a few mistakes on that end because they'll buy like
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speakers that they don't need, but they want and then
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they're oh, I should have bought brakes, I should have
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did an oil change. So it's not like our kids
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are stupid. Sometimes they just make their own decisions and
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that's okay. It's a learning experience for them, and we
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want them to know, Hey, you caught it yourself. You've
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seen it for yourself. You knew what you needed to do.
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Next time, it won't happen that way. You'll do the
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right thing first. So seeing our kids do all this
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and watching them to us as parents, we know we
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did something right because nobody is perfect and we make mistakes.
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Everybody makes mistakes. There is no book that life hands
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you of what you need to do in life and
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how you need to do it. You learn as you
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go and as young adults, I can say our children
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are very smart. Our children know what they gotta do.
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If they make a mistake, it's not super big, they'll
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fix it. I wouldn't say our kids are failures because
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I know our kids are not failures whatsoever. They are
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very smart children. We are always getting compliments on how
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our kids are. They have a great work ethic, they're
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very smart with money. All of them save and I'm
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gonna tell you, if our kids get anything five hundred
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or lower in their bank account, they will stop spending
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their money because at five hundred dollars, they think they're broke.
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And I'm glad because I want them to save, safe, save.
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I've always told them, if you hit a certain point
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in your bank account and you feel like you know
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that's your limit, don't use any money until you get
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paid again. Save, save, saved, because let's say you blow
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a tire, where's that money coming from. You're gonna have
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to find money or go without a vehicle with maybe
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you donut tire. My kids are very smart. I am
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so proud of what all of our children have accomplished
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in life so far, and I cannot wait to see
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what the younger three have in store because they are
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learning not only from us, but from their siblings. They
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see their struggles, they're like, oh, especially Madison, She's always like, well,
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you shouldn't have spent that money. You should have done this,
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or you should have boughten. That stuff that they need
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comes first once or on the back burner, and if
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you want it bad enough, you will save that money
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to buy it. And that's what our children do so.
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It's always great seeing your kids struggle a little bit
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it but then they fix it and then they don't struggle.
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That's a good thing for us. I love seeing that,
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and I love that the younger ones see it because
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it's teaching them as well as us as parents teaching
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the younger ones as well. I'm gonna end this with
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my final thoughts, and I just want to say parenting
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is never about being perfect. It's about being intentional making
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sure kids have what they need. Growing up is a
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constant balancing act between providing, guiding and letting them figure
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things out on their own. Kids don't need perfection. They
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need parents who show up, who care, and who create
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an environment where they feel safe, loved, and prepared for
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the real world. We'd love to hear from you. You
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can send us a Facebook message on our We are
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the Hansen's Facebook page. You can send us an email
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at we Arethehanson Show at gmail dot com, and please
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go over and like our YouTube channel. We are the Hansens.
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Thanks for joining us today and we are the Hansens
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until next time. Keep loving your family and showing up
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for your kids. It makes all the difference in the world.
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