Dec. 1, 2025
Laughter Is Our Love Language
In this heart-warming (and hilarious) episode of We Are the Hansons, Myia takes you inside the beautiful chaos of life with 13 kids, a full house, and a marriage built on humor, grace, and a whole lot of patience. From unexpected messes to unforgettable family moments, this episode explores how laughter has become the glue that holds the Hanson family together.
Myia shares the now-legendary story of the weekend their oldest daughter Courtnee came to visit—only to wake up to smashed eggs all over the kitchen floor thanks to Tristan. Instead of frustration, the moment turned into pure joy as she and Morgan slid around in the mess, laughing until they cried. It’s these perfectly imperfect moments that remind the Hansons why choosing joy—even in chaos—makes all the difference.
Whether you’re raising a big family, dreaming of one, or just need a reminder that laughter truly is a love language, this episode brings warmth, vulnerability, and humor in every minute.
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You know that moment when the house is finally quiet,
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like actually quiet, where you think did everyone disappear? Did
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I dream this whole family? And then out of absolutely nowhere,
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someone trips over a laundry basket and laughter just explodes
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like confetti, like fireworks made of joy. That's us. That's
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our language, a love language made of giggles, chaos, and
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the occasional well broken lamp. Welcome to We Are the
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Hands Ends. I'm Maya, and today today we're celebrating the
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one thing that holds this wild, beautiful, messy crew together
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even on the days when everything feels upside down. You're
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listening to We Are the Hansens, the podcast where love
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is loud, life is messy, and family is well full.
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Thirteen kids, one bathroom, endless stories, and a whole lot
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of laughter. Mornings in our House aren't just chaotic, they're
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a full soundtrack, not always a good one, but definitely
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an original. There's the percussion section, pots hands an occasional
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plate that someone thought they could balance while running. There's
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the vocal section, were's my shoe? Who took my hairbrush? Mom?
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Can you mom? Mom? And then there's me, the conductor
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standing in the middle of the kitchen, holding a spatula
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like a baton, wondering if anyone can actually hear me
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when I say breakfast is ready. But here's the thing
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about chaos, sometimes it creates the most beautiful moments. So
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one morning, this was maybe eight months ago, one of
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the little ones, let's call her the artist, she grabs
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a giant bowl, I'm talking mixing bowl size, fills it
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with cereal, and I mean fills it like structural engineering
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levels of cereal. Then the milk, and she's carrying it
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so carefully, you know, both hands, tongue sticking out in concentration.
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She makes it three steps, milk everywhere, cereal floating like
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little life rafts in a dairy ocean. And this kid,
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she just freezes, looks at me with these huge eyes, like, mom,
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I don't think I plan this part. One of the
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older kids, I think it was Madison, comes running into help,
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doesn't see the milk like forming on the floor, steps
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right in it. For a second. Nobody moves, nobody breathes,
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and then Maddie starts laughing, and suddenly the whole room
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just erupts. The little one who spilled it laughing so
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hard She's sitting in the cereal puddle, Maddie on the floor,
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sliding back and forth like she's doing the worm. The
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other kids coming in to see what happened, slipping, catching
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each other, laughing until they can't stand. And I'm standing
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there holding a dish towel, looking at the absolute disaster,
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and I'm laughing too, because in those moments, you remember
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why the chaos is worth it. It's not about the mess.
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It's never about the mess. It's about what happens in
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the mess. Connection, joy, the sound of your kids, not
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caring about being perfect, just being alive. That's the soundtrack
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of our home. Not silence, not perfection, not order. Laughter. Okay, okay,
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let me tell you about the weekend, the one Courtney
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came home for a visit, the one that well, we'll
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live in the family legend forever. So Courtney doesn't live
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at home, and she came to visit particular weekend. She
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doesn't sleep in, which is, you know, a luxury when
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you grow up in a house of fifteen people, like
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actual silence, no jumping on your bed, no toddlers screaming
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about missing socks. At six am. She's dreaming, peaceful, happy,
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and then she wakes up to this sound, something wet,
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something wrong. She opens her eyes, checks her phone. Seven
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thirty am. She sits up, yawns, starts walking towards the
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kitchen for a drink, because that's what you do when
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you're home, You caffeinate before you adult. She rounds the
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corner in the kitchen and there on the floor are eggs.
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Not like one egg, not like two eggs. We're talking
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a carton of eggs, smashed everywhere, shiny, slimy, a literal
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slip and slide made for breakfast protein. And standing in
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the middle of the egg apocalypse, proud as a peacock,
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arms covered in yoke, is Tristan. Tristan, buddy, what happened here?
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He made it slippery, he said, it was like he'd
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won a science fair. Courtney looks at the floor, looks
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at Tristan, looks at the floor again, and I can
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see her brain trying to compute, like what I do?
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Do I clean this? Do I call mom? Do I
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just leave the state? And then Morgan walks in. Morgan
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takes one look at the egg covered floor, one look
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at Courtney, one look at Tristan's proud little face, and
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she grins and I swear to you, I swear to you.
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These two grown girls look at each other like they're
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having a telepathic conversation, and Courtney says, you're thinking what
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I'm thinking. And before I can even get out the
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words please don't, Courtney runs and slides across the kitchen
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floor like she's stealing home base. Morgan goes next. They're
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sliding back and forth like kids on an ice rink,
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Eggs flying yoke on the walls. Tristan is losing his
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mind with joy, clapping and laughing, and I walk in.
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I walk into this. My kitchen looks like crime scene
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directed by Doctor Seuss. My grown daughters are covered head
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to toe and raw egg, sliding around like penguins, and
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they're laughing so hard they can't breathe. And you know
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what I did. I grabbed my phone and I took
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a picture, because this this is who we are, my
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grown children, sliding in raw egg on purpose, choosing joy
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over cleanliness, choosing memory over well sanity. And I'm standing
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there thinking, this is our family, this is our language,
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this ridiculous, beautiful, sticky, hilarious language. We cleaned it up.
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Eventually it took an hour. It was so worth it.
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Here's something I find absolutely fascinating. Laughter isn't just noise.
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It's not just air leaving your body in a weird
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rhythmatic pattern. Laughter is chemistry. When you laugh, like really laugh,
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your brain releases and doorphins. Those are your body's natural
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feel good chemicals, the same ones you get from exercise, chocolate,
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hugging someone you love. But here's the kicker. Laughter also
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lowers cortisol. That's your stress hormone, the thing that makes
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you feel like you're drowning in to do list and worry.
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So every time you laugh, your body is literally giving
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you medicine. In a household of fifteen people, laugh isn't optional,
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it's survival. We tried once to have a serious family
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chore meeting. I had a list, I had a color
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coded chart. I was ready. We were going to tackle
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the chore situation like adults, or at least like people
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who occasionally claim things. Everyone's sitting there, various levels of enthusiasm,
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which is to say none. The older kids are on
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their phones, the middle kids are making faces at each other,
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the little ones are, I don't know, vibrating. I start
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going through the list. Okay, so Monday through Wednesday we
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need someone on and one of the kids I won't
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name names, but she knows who she is, mutters, and
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one of the other kids snorts, which makes another kid
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start giggling, which makes the little ones start laughing even
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though they don't know why they're laughing, and suddenly someone
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falls off the couch. The whole room just explodes. I'm
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trying to regain control. I'm holding my chart up like guys, guys,
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we need to and the chart riffs in half because
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of course it does us. And at that point I
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gave up. I sat down and I laughed too. Did
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chores get assigned that night? Eventually, after twenty more minutes
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of chaos? Did anyone remember their chores? Let's not ask
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hard questions, but you know what we do, remember the laughter,
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the moment, that feeling of being together and letting the
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perfectionism just fall away. Because here's the truth. Your kids
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won't remember the color coded chor chart, they won't remember
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the perfectly organized Tuesday schedule, but they will remember the
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night you laughed so hard you couldn't breathe. They'll remember
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the moment you chose joy over structure, and that's the
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memory that matters. Laughter isn't just for kids. After twenty
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two years with my husband, some of our most rhematic
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moments are ones where we laugh so hard we can't breathe.
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And I know that sounds weird, right Like when you
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think romance, you think candles, soft music, meaningful gazes across
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the table, and sure those are nice, but you know
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what's more romantic accidentally snorting while laughing so hard you
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spit out your water, and your husband looking at you
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like you're the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. So
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we tried cooking together one night, and by tried, I
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mean we attempted to make a meal that didn't come
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from a box or involve chicken nuggets. We're in the kitchen,
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kids are occupied elsewhere, miracle, We've got music on. We're
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chopping vegetables like we're cooking in a show, feeling very sophisticated,
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and then the smoke start because we got distracted. We
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were talking and laughing and I don't know, probably making
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eyes at each other like teenagers, and we completely forgot
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the pan. Smoke alarms are going off. We're running around
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trying to wave towels at the smoke detector. He's fanning
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with a dish towel. I'm opening windows. The dinner is well,
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it's carbon no and we just look at each other
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and start laughing. Not polite laughter, not oops laughter, full
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body can't breathe, tears streaming, have to sit down on
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the floor. Laughter. We ordered pizza, ate it on the
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kitchen floor, still in our romantic dinner outfits, surrounded by
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the smell of burnt stir fry, and it was perfect.
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Here's what I've learned about laughter and marriage. It's the
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jokes whispered at night when you're supposed to be sleeping.
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It's the inside glances across a crowded room when someone
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says something only you two would find hilarious. It's the
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snort laughs during serious moments, the times you're trying to
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be mad at each other but someone cracks and suddenly
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you're both laughing instead of fighting. That's where intimacy lives,
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not in perfection, not in chorographed date nights, in the
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moments where you're both a little ridiculous and you love
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each other anyway or maybe because of it. Here's something
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I struggle with. It's impossible to give thirteen kids equal
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individual attention all the time, like mathematically, logistically, physically impossible.
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There are nights I go to bed thinking did I
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talk to everyone today? Did I see everyone? Did anyone
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feel invisible? And that fear it sits with you. But
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here's what I've discovered. Laughter bridges the gap. One of
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the little ones had a hard day. I don't remember
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what happened. Maybe a friend was mean, maybe they felt
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left out, maybe nothing specific and everything general. But they
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were sitting on the couch, quiet, crying, you know that
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cry where they're trying so hard not to let it out,
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but it's coming out anyway. One of their older sisters
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sat down next to them, and for a minute, she
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just sat there, didn't force it, didn't demand an explanation,
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just presence. And then she started making faces, ridiculous faces,
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crossing her eyes, puffing out her cheeks, wiggling her ears.
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And the little one they tried so hard not to smile.
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You could see them fighting it, but then they laughed.
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Just like that, a hard day turned into a soft moment.
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Laughter became a language of comfort of I see you,
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I'm here, You're not alone. I didn't fix that day.
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I didn't even know it was happening until later. But
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laughter did what I couldn't do in that moment. It
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connected them. When you have a big family, laughter becomes
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a shorthand. It becomes a way of saying I love
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you without stopping what you're doing. It becomes a way
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of checking in without formal sit downs. It's the way
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we apologize after arguments, the way we celebrate tiny victories,
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the way we survive long car rides and short tempers
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and days that feel impossibly heavy. Laughter is our love language,
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and maybe it's yours too, Whether you have one kid
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or thirteen, whether your house is quiet or chaos. Maybe
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laughter is how you say we're going to be okay, okay.
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So if you're listening and thinking that sounds great, maya,
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but my house feels heavy right now. How do I
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build more laughter into our life? I got you first,
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turn churs into games. I know you're rolling your eyes,
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but hear me out. Instead of go clean your room,
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try I bet you can't beat your record from last week.
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Or let's see who can pick up the most toys
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before the song ends. Suddenly, competition, suddenly fun. Does it
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work every time? No? But when it does magic. Second,
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celebrate tiny victories with big silliness. Kid tied their shoes,
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do a ridiculous dance. They remembered to brush their teeth
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without being asked. Act like they just want an oscar,
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make it observe, Make them laugh at how over the
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top you're being, because you're teaching them that joy doesn't
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have to wait for big moments. It can live in
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Tuesday morning, in the boring parts, in the middle of
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nothing special. That's a gift that lasts forever. Third, and
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this is maybe the most important one. Laugh at yourself first.
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If you burn dinner, Laugh if you trip over a toy.
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Laugh if you completely forget what you were saying mid
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sentence because your brain is mush. Laugh. Your kids are watching.
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They're learning how to respond to failure, to embarrassment, to imperform.
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If they see you laughing at your own mistakes, they'll
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learn it's safe to be a human, and that that's everything. Fourth,
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let your kids see you choose joy, because laughter, especially
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in hard seasons, is a choice. There are days when
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I don't feel like laughing, days when the weight of
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it all sits heavy bills, worries, exhaustion that goes bone deep.
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But I've learned that joy isn't something you wait for,
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it's something you create. So sometimes I make myself laugh.
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I crack a joke, I do something silly just to
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break the heaviness. And my kids see that, they see
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me choosing light over dark, and they learn that they
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can too. That might be the most important thing I
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ever teach them. So, wherever you are right now, if
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you're feels heavy, if laughter feels far away, start small.
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Find one moment today, one tiny, ridiculous moment, and laugh.
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It builds, I promise you know. When people ask me
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what it's like to raise thirteen kids, I think they
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