May 5, 2025
Cool Parents or Cringe Parents? | We Are the Hansons
In this hilarious and heartwarming episode of We Are the Hansons, we dive into the age-old debate: are we totally rad parents or just a walking cringe compilation? From dad jokes to mom’s TikTok attempts, we explore the fine line between bonding and embarrassing, with real stories, family confessions, and laugh-out-loud moments. Tune in for relatable parenting chaos, teen eye-rolls, and the beauty of not taking yourself too seriously.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/we-are-the-hanson-s-family-life-practical-tips-self-care--6044253/support.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
WEBVTT
1
00:00:20.440 --> 00:00:23.399
Hi, friends, and welcome back to We Are the Hansens.
2
00:00:23.640 --> 00:00:28.320
I'm your host, Maya Hansen, mam of thirteen, white and
3
00:00:28.600 --> 00:00:34.600
passionate believer that parenting should be equal parts meaningful and hilarious.
4
00:00:35.159 --> 00:00:38.880
Today's episode is all about a question that creeps up
5
00:00:38.920 --> 00:00:42.280
when you're jamming to your old school playlist in the car,
6
00:00:43.039 --> 00:00:46.240
or when you try to relate to your teen and
7
00:00:46.320 --> 00:00:50.000
get that look. Are we cool parents or are we
8
00:00:50.159 --> 00:00:55.600
just totally cringe. We're unpacking what it means to be
9
00:00:56.159 --> 00:01:00.000
a cool parent in twenty twenty five, how we measure
10
00:01:00.119 --> 00:01:05.040
or that, and most importantly, why cringe might actually be
11
00:01:05.159 --> 00:01:10.280
the goal. Let's jump in. Let's start with a dose
12
00:01:10.359 --> 00:01:13.959
of reality. The other day, one of my teens caught
13
00:01:13.959 --> 00:01:19.359
me trying to use the phrase that slaps to describe
14
00:01:19.879 --> 00:01:23.879
a dinner I made, and you would have thought I
15
00:01:23.920 --> 00:01:29.200
committed a felony eye roll, headshake, walk away. I thought
16
00:01:29.239 --> 00:01:37.159
I was being fun, relatable. Nope, cringe. And then there
17
00:01:37.280 --> 00:01:39.719
was that moment when I attempted to show off a
18
00:01:39.840 --> 00:01:46.599
TikTok dance. I saw my youngest literally screamed, mom stop,
19
00:01:48.200 --> 00:01:51.879
and that's when it hit me. I've officially crossed into
20
00:01:52.439 --> 00:01:59.040
cringe territory. But here's the thing I was trying. I
21
00:01:59.079 --> 00:02:05.319
was trying to connect, to be present. That has to
22
00:02:05.400 --> 00:02:10.439
count for something. Right after I recovered from the dance incident,
23
00:02:11.199 --> 00:02:13.599
I asked a few of our kids what actually makes
24
00:02:13.599 --> 00:02:19.280
a parent cool. Their answers were not what I expected.
25
00:02:20.159 --> 00:02:23.840
It wasn't about being trendy, it was about being available.
26
00:02:25.719 --> 00:02:29.719
They said things like, you let us be weird without
27
00:02:29.759 --> 00:02:35.439
freaking out. You actually care about what I like. You
28
00:02:35.479 --> 00:02:38.599
don't judge me for having one hundred tabs open in
29
00:02:38.680 --> 00:02:43.840
my brain. Apparently I'm cool because I watched scary movies
30
00:02:43.840 --> 00:02:48.919
with them, because I try their music, even if I
31
00:02:48.919 --> 00:02:53.479
don't always get it. Being cool, it turns out, is
32
00:02:53.520 --> 00:02:58.479
about showing up and staying interested even when we don't
33
00:02:58.599 --> 00:03:06.240
understand every trend. So let's talk about embracing the cringe.
34
00:03:06.280 --> 00:03:13.759
Every generation has their awkward face, and every set of
35
00:03:13.840 --> 00:03:19.680
parents ends up doing something their kids find mortifying. I
36
00:03:19.719 --> 00:03:24.080
remember my parents dancing to disco music or using outdated
37
00:03:24.199 --> 00:03:30.120
slang like groovy. I cringed. Then I get it now.
38
00:03:30.719 --> 00:03:37.680
The truth is your kids are teasing you for your
39
00:03:37.759 --> 00:03:44.479
quarks and your goofy moments. That's a good sign. It
40
00:03:44.560 --> 00:03:49.360
means they feel safe enough to joke. It means they
41
00:03:49.400 --> 00:03:55.080
know you're not perfect and they love you anyway. Cringe
42
00:03:55.159 --> 00:04:01.240
is a side effect of connection. If you're never a
43
00:04:01.280 --> 00:04:06.840
little awkward with your kids, are you even really engaging?
44
00:04:08.280 --> 00:04:12.319
So yes, I will keep singing too loud on road trips.
45
00:04:13.199 --> 00:04:18.480
I'll keep wearing sneakers they hate because that's who I
46
00:04:18.519 --> 00:04:21.720
am and I want them to feel free to be
47
00:04:21.839 --> 00:04:28.240
exactly who they are too. Now let's flip the mirror around.
48
00:04:29.319 --> 00:04:34.040
Where do you land on the cool verse cringe scale?
49
00:04:34.199 --> 00:04:37.319
Here are some questions to think about. Do you let
50
00:04:37.319 --> 00:04:43.600
your kids lead conversations sometimes? Do you listen without always correcting?
51
00:04:45.319 --> 00:04:52.160
Do you laugh at your own parenting fails? If you said, yes, congratulations,
52
00:04:52.639 --> 00:04:56.920
you're cool in the ways that matter. Because cool isn't style,
53
00:04:57.480 --> 00:05:02.920
it's a relationship. Cringe is just proof that we're trying.
54
00:05:03.480 --> 00:05:07.199
And I'd rather be cringey and connected than cool and distant.
55
00:05:09.240 --> 00:05:15.160
Letting the kids decide anonymous, vote cool or cringe. Our
56
00:05:15.279 --> 00:05:22.519
dance moves at home or in public, be honest slang
57
00:05:22.600 --> 00:05:27.959
we've tried to use and failed. Do our kids actually
58
00:05:28.120 --> 00:05:31.800
like our music playlist? Well? Guess what I know? My
59
00:05:31.959 --> 00:05:36.399
kids love my music playlist because I listen to everything.
60
00:05:37.040 --> 00:05:42.480
I can listen to heavy metal, rock, rap, Christian music
61
00:05:42.920 --> 00:05:48.920
that is my favorite, country, R and B, you know,
62
00:05:49.079 --> 00:05:52.319
hip hop. I can go through and listen to any
63
00:05:52.360 --> 00:05:58.800
of them. So my kids love the music I listened to,
64
00:05:58.920 --> 00:06:02.639
so that, I guess makes me cool. When we try
65
00:06:02.680 --> 00:06:08.120
to relate by mentioning TikTok trends, sometimes it's too late
66
00:06:08.279 --> 00:06:15.519
because our kids have already mastered those fashion moments. Our
67
00:06:15.519 --> 00:06:21.040
mom jeans and dad socks in or out. I think
68
00:06:21.079 --> 00:06:23.399
I wear my clothes the same as my children. I
69
00:06:23.399 --> 00:06:26.800
think my husband does. Sometimes he gets a little goofy
70
00:06:26.839 --> 00:06:30.519
with his clothes and his style, but that's besides the point.
71
00:06:30.600 --> 00:06:34.120
And no, my kids don't always like my style. That's
72
00:06:34.160 --> 00:06:38.600
why they choose their own clothes. I make sure it's
73
00:06:38.639 --> 00:06:43.680
not too discreet. They need to have proper clothing, no
74
00:06:43.920 --> 00:06:49.959
belly shirts, stuff like that, no really short shorts. But
75
00:06:50.040 --> 00:06:52.639
other than that, they do pretty good about picking out
76
00:06:52.680 --> 00:06:58.519
their clothes. I would have to say that my husband, Jeremy,
77
00:06:59.319 --> 00:07:02.600
is the one who am embarrasses the kids more and
78
00:07:02.680 --> 00:07:05.639
how most of the time it is in front of
79
00:07:05.959 --> 00:07:11.759
either their boyfriends or in public. And for the older kids,
80
00:07:12.000 --> 00:07:18.360
if it's a boyfriend or girlfriend, he will tell embarrassing
81
00:07:18.439 --> 00:07:21.680
stories about when they were little, or this or that.
82
00:07:22.040 --> 00:07:25.480
If we're in a store, he will pass gas and
83
00:07:25.920 --> 00:07:29.879
take off and leave them standing there, or he'll just
84
00:07:30.399 --> 00:07:36.519
act goofy and the kids usually just walk away. Are
85
00:07:36.560 --> 00:07:43.879
parenting rules wise or way outdated? I think that we
86
00:07:43.959 --> 00:07:47.720
have a mixture of both. Why I say that is
87
00:07:47.800 --> 00:07:53.759
because we learned from our parents. Jeremy's parents have taught
88
00:07:53.839 --> 00:07:59.279
him and my parents have taught me. And I use
89
00:07:59.319 --> 00:08:03.279
some of my parent parenting rules from when I was little,
90
00:08:03.399 --> 00:08:06.360
and Jeremy uses some of his from when he was little.
91
00:08:07.439 --> 00:08:12.920
So yeah, our kids may say they're outdated, we still
92
00:08:13.279 --> 00:08:18.920
go off of those. One time we actually impressed our
93
00:08:19.000 --> 00:08:26.879
kids and just by different things, and they're like, wow,
94
00:08:27.040 --> 00:08:32.399
mom and dad, that's impressive. Sometimes we do try too
95
00:08:32.440 --> 00:08:39.720
hard and we're just being ourselves. I always have told
96
00:08:39.720 --> 00:08:44.200
my kids, you know, sing like nobody's listening, and dance
97
00:08:44.320 --> 00:08:47.200
like nobody's watching, because you know what, in the end,
98
00:08:48.399 --> 00:08:52.960
who cares what people think? So I guess my kids
99
00:08:53.000 --> 00:08:59.720
have really learned from that, and I'm glad because I
100
00:08:59.759 --> 00:09:05.600
want them to be themselves. I myself, and yeah, I
101
00:09:05.759 --> 00:09:09.639
might be cool, or they may say I'm cringe, but
102
00:09:10.399 --> 00:09:13.720
I am who I am. I've noticed that most of
103
00:09:13.759 --> 00:09:18.240
my kids have followed that footstep because we don't care
104
00:09:18.320 --> 00:09:21.679
what people think. We don't care if they think we're cool.
105
00:09:21.799 --> 00:09:25.720
We don't care if they think we're crazy. We don't care.
106
00:09:26.440 --> 00:09:31.039
So I guess that, you know, is a good thing.
107
00:09:32.120 --> 00:09:37.279
My kids think I'm cringe because we always clean before
108
00:09:37.320 --> 00:09:40.600
we have company. You know, I don't want my company
109
00:09:40.600 --> 00:09:44.480
coming here and seeing a messy house. They should be
110
00:09:44.480 --> 00:09:46.799
able to come to my house and see it nice
111
00:09:46.799 --> 00:09:49.399
and clean. I'm going to talk about the time that
112
00:09:49.480 --> 00:09:53.360
I tried to dress like a younger version because my
113
00:09:53.480 --> 00:09:57.799
kids wanted me to and totally miss the mark. My
114
00:09:57.879 --> 00:10:00.480
kids looked at me and they're like, Mom, you need
115
00:10:00.480 --> 00:10:04.200
to go change. You are not being seen in public
116
00:10:04.240 --> 00:10:08.600
with us like that. And I'm like, why because that
117
00:10:08.679 --> 00:10:14.000
shirt is out of style. Frankly, I liked it. Now.
118
00:10:14.559 --> 00:10:19.240
They do say that to their dad as well, because
119
00:10:19.279 --> 00:10:24.600
sometimes he tends to wear clothes that make him look
120
00:10:25.080 --> 00:10:30.360
way older than what he is. My kids always tease
121
00:10:30.440 --> 00:10:37.080
us also about how we react to celebrity gossip. It
122
00:10:37.440 --> 00:10:41.840
may be relatable or totally out of touch. You know,
123
00:10:41.960 --> 00:10:47.399
we don't sit there and dig in, which my kids do,
124
00:10:48.480 --> 00:10:51.639
because they have to be up on everything, especially if
125
00:10:51.679 --> 00:10:59.559
it's a celebrity that they follow. Sometimes we call their
126
00:10:59.559 --> 00:11:04.679
friends by the wrong name again, not meaning to it,
127
00:11:04.720 --> 00:11:07.320
and they'll be like, would you stop calling them that?
128
00:11:07.320 --> 00:11:11.519
That is not their name. You are calling them somebody
129
00:11:11.519 --> 00:11:16.600
else that ain't who that is. It happens. They have
130
00:11:16.639 --> 00:11:19.360
a lot of friends. We get them mixed up. It's
131
00:11:19.399 --> 00:11:26.519
fine when we volunteer at school, proud moment or please
132
00:11:27.159 --> 00:11:30.360
stay in the car. My kids always want me to
133
00:11:30.399 --> 00:11:35.480
be the one to volunteer because Dad says stuff when
134
00:11:35.960 --> 00:11:40.080
they're at school, and I guess it embarrasses them, especially
135
00:11:40.120 --> 00:11:44.799
the younger ones like Maddie Torn and Anna, and they
136
00:11:44.799 --> 00:11:50.720
always want mom to go. Also, we have let the
137
00:11:50.799 --> 00:11:54.840
kids give us makeovers. Do we dare? Yeah, if we do.
138
00:11:55.559 --> 00:12:00.480
I've let Maddie, Torn, Anna and Morgan all give me
139
00:12:00.519 --> 00:12:07.000
a makeover. I am not a big fan of a
140
00:12:07.039 --> 00:12:15.080
lot of makeup. Sometimes I'll wear just eyeliner. Most of
141
00:12:15.120 --> 00:12:20.720
the time I wear just eyeliner, blush and cover up.
142
00:12:21.320 --> 00:12:24.720
That's it. That's my thing. The kids always want to
143
00:12:24.879 --> 00:12:30.960
have me wear you know, mass SCAA and all this
144
00:12:31.200 --> 00:12:34.840
different fancy stuff, and I can even tell you I
145
00:12:34.840 --> 00:12:37.639
don't even own half the stuff that they want me
146
00:12:37.720 --> 00:12:41.879
to wear, so they think I'm not cool because of that,
147
00:12:42.279 --> 00:12:47.200
and that's okay. So where do I land? A little
148
00:12:47.240 --> 00:12:52.960
bit cool, a lot of bit cringe, and I'm fully
149
00:12:53.000 --> 00:12:57.159
okay with that. Parenting is messy and weird and filled
150
00:12:57.200 --> 00:13:02.759
with moments that make you want to face ponem. But
151
00:13:03.559 --> 00:13:08.559
it's also full of laughter, learning and love. Thanks for
152
00:13:08.600 --> 00:13:12.480
hanging out with me today. We are the Hansens. If
153
00:13:12.960 --> 00:13:18.240
this made you smile or think, share it with another parent.
154
00:13:19.799 --> 00:13:23.399
You can go over and subscribe to our We are
155
00:13:23.399 --> 00:13:26.639
the Hanson's YouTube channel. You can message me on our
156
00:13:26.679 --> 00:13:30.519
We are the Hanson's Facebook page or send me a
157
00:13:31.240 --> 00:13:35.039
email on our We are thee. Hansen's Show at gmail
158
00:13:35.080 --> 00:13:42.200
dot com. What's the cringiest thing you've done lately? Until
159
00:13:42.240 --> 00:13:46.879
next time, keep showing up, keep laughing, and remember being
160
00:13:47.000 --> 00:14:13.559
real is the coolest thing you can be. Def
1
00:00:20.440 --> 00:00:23.399
2
00:00:23.640 --> 00:00:28.320
3
00:00:28.600 --> 00:00:34.600
4
00:00:35.159 --> 00:00:38.880
5
00:00:38.920 --> 00:00:42.280
6
00:00:43.039 --> 00:00:46.240
7
00:00:46.320 --> 00:00:50.000
8
00:00:50.159 --> 00:00:55.600
9
00:00:56.159 --> 00:01:00.000
10
00:01:00.119 --> 00:01:05.040
11
00:01:05.159 --> 00:01:10.280
12
00:01:10.359 --> 00:01:13.959
13
00:01:13.959 --> 00:01:19.359
14
00:01:19.879 --> 00:01:23.879
15
00:01:23.920 --> 00:01:29.200
16
00:01:29.239 --> 00:01:37.159
17
00:01:37.280 --> 00:01:39.719
18
00:01:39.840 --> 00:01:46.599
19
00:01:48.200 --> 00:01:51.879
20
00:01:52.439 --> 00:01:59.040
21
00:01:59.079 --> 00:02:05.319
22
00:02:05.400 --> 00:02:10.439
23
00:02:11.199 --> 00:02:13.599
24
00:02:13.599 --> 00:02:19.280
25
00:02:20.159 --> 00:02:23.840
26
00:02:25.719 --> 00:02:29.719
27
00:02:29.759 --> 00:02:35.439
28
00:02:35.479 --> 00:02:38.599
29
00:02:38.680 --> 00:02:43.840
30
00:02:43.840 --> 00:02:48.919
31
00:02:48.919 --> 00:02:53.479
32
00:02:53.520 --> 00:02:58.479
33
00:02:58.599 --> 00:03:06.240
34
00:03:06.280 --> 00:03:13.759
35
00:03:13.840 --> 00:03:19.680
36
00:03:19.719 --> 00:03:24.080
37
00:03:24.199 --> 00:03:30.120
38
00:03:30.719 --> 00:03:37.680
39
00:03:37.759 --> 00:03:44.479
40
00:03:44.560 --> 00:03:49.360
41
00:03:49.400 --> 00:03:55.080
42
00:03:55.159 --> 00:04:01.240
43
00:04:01.280 --> 00:04:06.840
44
00:04:08.280 --> 00:04:12.319
45
00:04:13.199 --> 00:04:18.480
46
00:04:18.519 --> 00:04:21.720
47
00:04:21.839 --> 00:04:28.240
48
00:04:29.319 --> 00:04:34.040
49
00:04:34.199 --> 00:04:37.319
50
00:04:37.319 --> 00:04:43.600
51
00:04:45.319 --> 00:04:52.160
52
00:04:52.639 --> 00:04:56.920
53
00:04:57.480 --> 00:05:02.920
54
00:05:03.480 --> 00:05:07.199
55
00:05:09.240 --> 00:05:15.160
56
00:05:15.279 --> 00:05:22.519
57
00:05:22.600 --> 00:05:27.959
58
00:05:28.120 --> 00:05:31.800
59
00:05:31.959 --> 00:05:36.399
60
00:05:37.040 --> 00:05:42.480
61
00:05:42.920 --> 00:05:48.920
62
00:05:49.079 --> 00:05:52.319
63
00:05:52.360 --> 00:05:58.800
64
00:05:58.920 --> 00:06:02.639
65
00:06:02.680 --> 00:06:08.120
66
00:06:08.279 --> 00:06:15.519
67
00:06:15.519 --> 00:06:21.040
68
00:06:21.079 --> 00:06:23.399
69
00:06:23.399 --> 00:06:26.800
70
00:06:26.839 --> 00:06:30.519
71
00:06:30.600 --> 00:06:34.120
72
00:06:34.160 --> 00:06:38.600
73
00:06:38.639 --> 00:06:43.680
74
00:06:43.920 --> 00:06:49.959
75
00:06:50.040 --> 00:06:52.639
76
00:06:52.680 --> 00:06:58.519
77
00:06:59.319 --> 00:07:02.600
78
00:07:02.680 --> 00:07:05.639
79
00:07:05.959 --> 00:07:11.759
80
00:07:12.000 --> 00:07:18.360
81
00:07:18.439 --> 00:07:21.680
82
00:07:22.040 --> 00:07:25.480
83
00:07:25.920 --> 00:07:29.879
84
00:07:30.399 --> 00:07:36.519
85
00:07:36.560 --> 00:07:43.879
86
00:07:43.959 --> 00:07:47.720
87
00:07:47.800 --> 00:07:53.759
88
00:07:53.839 --> 00:07:59.279
89
00:07:59.319 --> 00:08:03.279
90
00:08:03.399 --> 00:08:06.360
91
00:08:07.439 --> 00:08:12.920
92
00:08:13.279 --> 00:08:18.920
93
00:08:19.000 --> 00:08:26.879
94
00:08:27.040 --> 00:08:32.399
95
00:08:32.440 --> 00:08:39.720
96
00:08:39.720 --> 00:08:44.200
97
00:08:44.320 --> 00:08:47.200
98
00:08:48.399 --> 00:08:52.960
99
00:08:53.000 --> 00:08:59.720
100
00:08:59.759 --> 00:09:05.600
101
00:09:05.759 --> 00:09:09.639
102
00:09:10.399 --> 00:09:13.720
103
00:09:13.759 --> 00:09:18.240
104
00:09:18.320 --> 00:09:21.679
105
00:09:21.799 --> 00:09:25.720
106
00:09:26.440 --> 00:09:31.039
107
00:09:32.120 --> 00:09:37.279
108
00:09:37.320 --> 00:09:40.600
109
00:09:40.600 --> 00:09:44.480
110
00:09:44.480 --> 00:09:46.799
111
00:09:46.799 --> 00:09:49.399
112
00:09:49.480 --> 00:09:53.360
113
00:09:53.480 --> 00:09:57.799
114
00:09:57.879 --> 00:10:00.480
115
00:10:00.480 --> 00:10:04.200
116
00:10:04.240 --> 00:10:08.600
117
00:10:08.679 --> 00:10:14.000
118
00:10:14.559 --> 00:10:19.240
119
00:10:19.279 --> 00:10:24.600
120
00:10:25.080 --> 00:10:30.360
121
00:10:30.440 --> 00:10:37.080
122
00:10:37.440 --> 00:10:41.840
123
00:10:41.960 --> 00:10:47.399
124
00:10:48.480 --> 00:10:51.639
125
00:10:51.679 --> 00:10:59.559
126
00:10:59.559 --> 00:11:04.679
127
00:11:04.720 --> 00:11:07.320
128
00:11:07.320 --> 00:11:11.519
129
00:11:11.519 --> 00:11:16.600
130
00:11:16.639 --> 00:11:19.360
131
00:11:19.399 --> 00:11:26.519
132
00:11:27.159 --> 00:11:30.360
133
00:11:30.399 --> 00:11:35.480
134
00:11:35.960 --> 00:11:40.080
135
00:11:40.120 --> 00:11:44.799
136
00:11:44.799 --> 00:11:50.720
137
00:11:50.799 --> 00:11:54.840
138
00:11:55.559 --> 00:12:00.480
139
00:12:00.519 --> 00:12:07.000
140
00:12:07.039 --> 00:12:15.080
141
00:12:15.120 --> 00:12:20.720
142
00:12:21.320 --> 00:12:24.720
143
00:12:24.879 --> 00:12:30.960
144
00:12:31.200 --> 00:12:34.840
145
00:12:34.840 --> 00:12:37.639
146
00:12:37.720 --> 00:12:41.879
147
00:12:42.279 --> 00:12:47.200
148
00:12:47.240 --> 00:12:52.960
149
00:12:53.000 --> 00:12:57.159
150
00:12:57.200 --> 00:13:02.759
151
00:13:03.559 --> 00:13:08.559
152
00:13:08.600 --> 00:13:12.480
153
00:13:12.960 --> 00:13:18.240
154
00:13:19.799 --> 00:13:23.399
155
00:13:23.399 --> 00:13:26.639
156
00:13:26.679 --> 00:13:30.519
157
00:13:31.240 --> 00:13:35.039
158
00:13:35.080 --> 00:13:42.200
159
00:13:42.240 --> 00:13:46.879
160
00:13:47.000 --> 00:14:13.559