March 3, 2026

Summer Time Is Almost Here

Summer Time Is Almost Here
Summer Time Is Almost Here
We are the Hanson's / Family Life, Practical Tips & Self-Care
Summer Time Is Almost Here
Apple Podcasts podcast player icon Spotify podcast player icon
Apple Podcasts podcast player icon Spotify podcast player icon

Summer doesn’t just arrive in the Hanson house — it explodes.

In this deeply personal episode of We Are the Hansons, Myia opens the door wide and invites you into the sacred in-between — that stretch of days right before summer officially begins. The air shifts. The evenings linger. The kids stop asking about homework and start asking, “When are we going?”

With thirteen kids, four grandbabies (and one more on the way), summer isn’t a season — it’s an event.

From packing the van for Florida to leaving room for a second mystery trip, Myia shares the beautiful chaos of family travel, why shared experiences matter more than perfect plans, and how memory is built mile by mile. She talks honestly about marriage in busy seasons, raising a large family through warm months, and the quiet realization that every summer is the last summer of this version of your child.

You’ll hear about:

  • Why travel is one of the greatest teachers
  • What summer really looks like in a big family
  • How to stay connected in marriage when the house is loud
  • The power of shared memories
  • A no-bake summer dessert recipe your kids will ask for every year
  • And why this summer feels different

This isn’t just about beach trips and palm trees.

It’s about presence.

It’s about gratitude.

It’s about choosing your people on purpose.

Whether you’re packing a van for the coast or planning a simple backyard fire, this episode will remind you that the most important adventures don’t require perfection — they require intention.

Summer is almost here.

Go plan something.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

WEBVTT

1
00:00:03.080 --> 00:00:05.759
You can feel it before you see it. There's this

2
00:00:05.960 --> 00:00:10.199
moment right around the last week of May where something shifts.

3
00:00:10.320 --> 00:00:15.199
The air changes, not just the temperature, although yeah, Springfield

4
00:00:15.279 --> 00:00:18.559
starts warming up fast, and you feel it the second

5
00:00:18.600 --> 00:00:21.760
you step outside in the morning. It's something deeper than that.

6
00:00:22.519 --> 00:00:26.480
It's a feeling in your chest, this low hum of anticipation,

7
00:00:27.239 --> 00:00:30.280
like your whole body knows what's coming before your brain

8
00:00:30.320 --> 00:00:33.280
has the chance to catch up. You walk outside and

9
00:00:33.320 --> 00:00:37.719
the sun hits different, the evening stretched just a little longer.

10
00:00:38.280 --> 00:00:39.280
The golden hour.

11
00:00:39.119 --> 00:00:43.079
That used to disappear by six o'clock now it's pushing

12
00:00:43.200 --> 00:00:46.840
seven seven point thirty, and the backyard is still lit up,

13
00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:50.759
like God left the porch light on for the whole neighborhood.

14
00:00:50.960 --> 00:00:54.159
The kids stop asking what's for dinner, they stop asking

15
00:00:54.200 --> 00:00:59.159
about homework, they stop fighting over the TV remote. Well mostly,

16
00:00:59.799 --> 00:01:07.159
they start asking one question, just one, over and over, Mom,

17
00:01:07.319 --> 00:01:10.640
when are we going? That's how you know summer is

18
00:01:10.640 --> 00:01:14.879
almost here. And in a house like ours, with thirteen kids,

19
00:01:15.319 --> 00:01:18.959
grand babies and one more on the way, summer doesn't

20
00:01:19.079 --> 00:01:23.120
just arrive quietly. It doesn't knock politely and wait to

21
00:01:23.120 --> 00:01:26.640
be invited in It explodes through the front door like

22
00:01:26.680 --> 00:01:30.040
a kid on the last day of school, Arms wide open,

23
00:01:30.719 --> 00:01:34.959
choos flying off at the entryway, desk chairs being pushed

24
00:01:35.079 --> 00:01:38.680
in so hard you can hear it echo down the hallway.

25
00:01:39.120 --> 00:01:44.799
Summer arrives loud. Summer arrives hungry. Summer smells like sunscreen

26
00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.599
and grilled food and chlorine and fresh cut grass all

27
00:01:48.680 --> 00:01:53.280
at the same time. Summer sounds like flipflops slapping against

28
00:01:53.359 --> 00:01:58.480
hardwood floors at seven in the morning, because for some reason,

29
00:01:58.799 --> 00:02:01.640
the little ones always wake up early when there is

30
00:02:01.760 --> 00:02:06.000
absolutely nothing they have to wake up for. It sounds

31
00:02:06.079 --> 00:02:09.280
like the hose running in the backyard. It sounds like

32
00:02:09.319 --> 00:02:13.719
someone yelling, And in our house there is always someone

33
00:02:13.879 --> 00:02:20.080
yelling who took my charger? Which, for the record, I

34
00:02:20.120 --> 00:02:23.919
need it known right now, this is not me. I

35
00:02:23.960 --> 00:02:27.000
have my charger. I keep it in the same place

36
00:02:27.080 --> 00:02:31.599
every single day. The charger situation in this house is

37
00:02:31.639 --> 00:02:35.080
not something I created, and I will not be accepting

38
00:02:35.159 --> 00:02:40.039
responsibility for it. But this summer, this summer has things

39
00:02:40.080 --> 00:02:43.400
lined up that has a whole house buzzing with excitement.

40
00:02:43.879 --> 00:02:49.080
We are heading to Florida, the beach, salt air, palm

41
00:02:49.120 --> 00:02:53.240
trees and someone definitely getting sand in places sand should

42
00:02:53.240 --> 00:02:58.560
not exist. And the second trip, well, we don't know yet,

43
00:02:58.639 --> 00:03:00.759
and honestly, that might.

44
00:03:00.639 --> 00:03:01.400
Be the best part.

45
00:03:02.520 --> 00:03:05.319
Welcome back to We Are the Hansens, the podcast where

46
00:03:05.319 --> 00:03:08.560
we open the door wide and let you step right

47
00:03:08.599 --> 00:03:14.919
into this big, loud, beautiful, sometimes absolutely chaotic life.

48
00:03:14.719 --> 00:03:15.960
We are building together.

49
00:03:16.919 --> 00:03:20.960
We talk about faith, we talk about family, we talk

50
00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:25.319
about marriage, We talk about what it actually looks like

51
00:03:25.479 --> 00:03:28.560
to raise a crew this size in a world that

52
00:03:28.639 --> 00:03:32.840
keeps telling you to slow down, to have fewer to

53
00:03:32.960 --> 00:03:36.520
need less. We talk about the hard days and the

54
00:03:36.599 --> 00:03:42.039
hilarious days, and in our house, honestly, most dates managed

55
00:03:42.039 --> 00:03:45.199
to be both at the same time. I'm Maya Hanson,

56
00:03:45.759 --> 00:03:48.520
and in this house, summer is not a season.

57
00:03:49.000 --> 00:03:52.000
It's an event. It's a full production.

58
00:03:52.879 --> 00:03:56.719
It has a budget and a packing list, several packing

59
00:03:56.759 --> 00:04:01.280
lists actually, and approximately six hundred decisions they have to

60
00:04:01.319 --> 00:04:04.120
be made before we ever pull out of the driveway.

61
00:04:04.599 --> 00:04:09.240
And guess who makes those decisions. That's right, you're listening

62
00:04:09.240 --> 00:04:13.400
to her right now. So today we're leaning all the

63
00:04:13.439 --> 00:04:18.000
way into it. We're talking about almost summer, that stretch

64
00:04:18.040 --> 00:04:21.720
of days right before the real thing hits the anticipation,

65
00:04:22.399 --> 00:04:26.399
the planning, why we travel as a family, what it

66
00:04:26.480 --> 00:04:30.319
does for our marriage, what it looks like raising a

67
00:04:30.399 --> 00:04:33.920
big crew through the warm months, and what this specific

68
00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:38.160
summer means for the Hansens. Pull up a chair or

69
00:04:38.240 --> 00:04:42.240
strap in for the drive. Either way, let's go. There's

70
00:04:42.279 --> 00:04:48.519
something sacred about almost almost summer, almost freedom, almost mornings

71
00:04:48.560 --> 00:04:51.319
where I don't have to set an alarm or make

72
00:04:51.480 --> 00:04:55.439
lunches or remind anyone when their next class is starting.

73
00:04:55.959 --> 00:04:59.560
It's this in between space. You're not quite there yet,

74
00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:03.720
but you can taste it. The homework is lighter, not

75
00:05:03.879 --> 00:05:10.079
just physically though, Yeah, the teachers are finally mercifully winding

76
00:05:10.120 --> 00:05:13.079
down and the kids are having less homework. But you

77
00:05:13.160 --> 00:05:16.120
can feel it in the way they move through this house.

78
00:05:16.560 --> 00:05:20.319
There's a looseness, a relief, like their whole bodies are

79
00:05:20.360 --> 00:05:24.360
finally starting to exhale after nine months of holding it together.

80
00:05:25.000 --> 00:05:29.079
My younger girls are obsessed right now, obsessed with swimsuits,

81
00:05:29.240 --> 00:05:32.439
obsessed with beach hair, and I'm right there with them

82
00:05:32.800 --> 00:05:36.199
because this is our thing, that is a mama and

83
00:05:36.399 --> 00:05:40.839
daughter's thing that I protect. We have had actual planning

84
00:05:40.879 --> 00:05:43.240
sessions this week about what we're doing with our hair

85
00:05:43.279 --> 00:05:47.480
at the beach, braids their waves, what works in humidity,

86
00:05:47.839 --> 00:05:51.680
whether we're coordinating? And I will tell you I am

87
00:05:51.800 --> 00:05:55.000
all the way in on every one of those conversations.

88
00:05:55.639 --> 00:05:58.319
The little ones are bouncing off the walls about Florida.

89
00:05:58.759 --> 00:06:02.600
They want to know everything. What we see dolphins? Can

90
00:06:02.639 --> 00:06:06.480
we catch crabs? Is the sand softer rocky? Can you

91
00:06:06.600 --> 00:06:12.519
touch a starfish? And I'm answering all of it, probably carefully, yes,

92
00:06:13.360 --> 00:06:15.240
and absolutely if.

93
00:06:15.079 --> 00:06:15.800
We find one.

94
00:06:16.240 --> 00:06:18.920
The older boys are doing that thing where they act

95
00:06:18.959 --> 00:06:21.920
too cool to be excited, But I am their mother.

96
00:06:22.480 --> 00:06:26.240
I see everything. I see Colin looking up fishing charters

97
00:06:26.319 --> 00:06:29.079
when he thinks no one is paying attention. I see

98
00:06:29.120 --> 00:06:32.800
Tristan quietly checking weather forecast for the days will be there.

99
00:06:33.360 --> 00:06:37.079
Gavin has already researched restaurants and sent Jeremy a list,

100
00:06:37.519 --> 00:06:41.879
which is exactly what Gavin would do. And Keenan Keenan

101
00:06:41.920 --> 00:06:44.839
has been ready for two months. He would have packed

102
00:06:44.879 --> 00:06:47.639
three weeks ago if I had let him. And then

103
00:06:47.720 --> 00:06:52.240
there's Jeremy, my husband, who is very enthusiastic about this

104
00:06:52.399 --> 00:06:56.560
trip and already has opinions about the route, the gas

105
00:06:56.639 --> 00:07:00.240
station stops, and the playlist. He has been putting together.

106
00:07:00.800 --> 00:07:03.480
He believes this playlist is going to last a whole drive.

107
00:07:04.160 --> 00:07:06.360
I'm going to let him keep believing that for a

108
00:07:06.439 --> 00:07:10.480
little while longer. Almost summer in this house is this

109
00:07:10.879 --> 00:07:15.040
window of pure hope before the i'mboard rolls in, which

110
00:07:15.399 --> 00:07:18.759
for the record, always hits around day three, before the

111
00:07:18.800 --> 00:07:23.439
heat becomes truly oppressive, before someone has a full meltdown

112
00:07:23.680 --> 00:07:28.120
at a rest stop in Tennessee. Right now, it's all possibility,

113
00:07:28.399 --> 00:07:31.160
and I want to sit in that feeling just a

114
00:07:31.160 --> 00:07:34.240
little longer before the full thing arrives. Let me be

115
00:07:34.319 --> 00:07:37.360
honest with you about something right off the top, travel

116
00:07:37.399 --> 00:07:41.480
with a family. Our size is not glamorous. It is

117
00:07:41.519 --> 00:07:45.040
not what you see on the highlight reels on social media,

118
00:07:45.399 --> 00:07:49.199
where everything is golden and everyone is smiling and nobody

119
00:07:49.240 --> 00:07:52.600
has asked where the snack bag is fourteen times.

120
00:07:52.920 --> 00:07:54.240
This is not our version.

121
00:07:54.560 --> 00:07:58.240
Our version involves in inventory I start three weeks.

122
00:07:57.920 --> 00:07:58.680
Before we leave.

123
00:07:58.959 --> 00:08:02.759
It involves nogoshi about who sits where, and I'm the

124
00:08:02.800 --> 00:08:07.800
negotiator and the mediator, and the final word. It involves

125
00:08:07.800 --> 00:08:10.639
a child announcing they need to use a bathroom eleven

126
00:08:10.720 --> 00:08:13.199
minutes after we pass the last rest stop.

127
00:08:13.639 --> 00:08:15.519
It involves forgetting something.

128
00:08:15.199 --> 00:08:19.199
Important, turning around and adding time to the drive while

129
00:08:19.319 --> 00:08:22.560
I take a deep breath and choose my response carefully.

130
00:08:23.000 --> 00:08:27.199
Travel with thirteen kids is not a vacation in the

131
00:08:27.240 --> 00:08:32.039
traditional sense. It is a coordinated migration, and I am

132
00:08:32.080 --> 00:08:33.240
the one coordinating it.

133
00:08:33.600 --> 00:08:36.559
And yet we do it every year.

134
00:08:36.960 --> 00:08:40.480
We do it because travel has never been about luxury

135
00:08:40.519 --> 00:08:43.919
for us. It's not about the room or the resort

136
00:08:44.200 --> 00:08:45.279
or the perfect photo.

137
00:08:45.720 --> 00:08:46.759
It's about memory.

138
00:08:47.159 --> 00:08:50.000
When you have a big family, you learn very fast

139
00:08:50.080 --> 00:08:52.600
that time does not move the way you think it will.

140
00:08:52.960 --> 00:08:56.320
You bring a baby home from a hospital, you're exhausted

141
00:08:56.440 --> 00:08:59.519
in a way you didn't know existed before that day.

142
00:09:00.080 --> 00:09:04.120
You're terrified in new ways every twenty four hours, and

143
00:09:04.159 --> 00:09:07.360
you think, I have eighteen years, eighteen years to shape

144
00:09:07.360 --> 00:09:10.000
this person, eighteen years before they go.

145
00:09:10.480 --> 00:09:13.960
And then you blink and they're walking. Blink again.

146
00:09:14.279 --> 00:09:17.080
They're in school and they have a best friend and

147
00:09:17.200 --> 00:09:21.399
strong opinions about what they want to wear, and somehow

148
00:09:21.960 --> 00:09:24.840
you blink a few more times and they're taller than you.

149
00:09:25.279 --> 00:09:29.240
They're driving, they're sitting at the Thanksgiving table as an adult,

150
00:09:29.720 --> 00:09:32.279
and you look across at them and think, when did

151
00:09:32.279 --> 00:09:37.399
you become this whole, complete, remarkable person. When did that happen?

152
00:09:37.879 --> 00:09:39.320
Time is ruthless.

153
00:09:39.759 --> 00:09:42.639
It doesn't slow down because you ask it to. It

154
00:09:42.679 --> 00:09:46.279
doesn't pause so a mama can catch her breath. It

155
00:09:46.440 --> 00:09:47.000
just moves.

156
00:09:47.440 --> 00:09:51.000
And if you don't mark the seasons, if you don't

157
00:09:51.159 --> 00:09:56.399
plant flags in specific moments and say this happened, we

158
00:09:56.399 --> 00:10:00.919
were all here, this belongs to us, those moments bleurn

159
00:10:01.000 --> 00:10:03.159
to the background noise of ordinary life.

160
00:10:03.559 --> 00:10:04.600
That's why we travel.

161
00:10:05.240 --> 00:10:09.679
Not because everything is easy, not because the budget always cooperates,

162
00:10:10.039 --> 00:10:15.240
not because packing for fifteen people is anyone's idea of relaxing.

163
00:10:15.759 --> 00:10:17.120
We travel because.

164
00:10:16.799 --> 00:10:20.080
Someday, someday, when Jeremy and I are sitting on a

165
00:10:20.120 --> 00:10:23.519
porch somewhere and the house has gone quiet, and the

166
00:10:23.600 --> 00:10:26.559
kids are all grown and scattered across their own lives,

167
00:10:26.960 --> 00:10:30.879
these thirteen are going to sit around a table together

168
00:10:31.320 --> 00:10:34.879
and someone is going to say, remember that trip to Florida,

169
00:10:35.559 --> 00:10:38.879
and another one will say which one, and they'll all

170
00:10:38.919 --> 00:10:42.679
start talking over each other, filling in the details, correcting

171
00:10:42.720 --> 00:10:46.399
each other's memories, laughing about the thing that went sideways,

172
00:10:46.879 --> 00:10:50.799
and those shared experiences, the ones only this family has,

173
00:10:51.320 --> 00:10:54.200
the ones we built together, Those are going to hold

174
00:10:54.240 --> 00:10:57.840
them to each other long after we're gone, long after

175
00:10:57.919 --> 00:10:59.159
this chapter closes.

176
00:11:00.039 --> 00:11:03.600
Trips become the thread. That's why I make the list.

177
00:11:04.200 --> 00:11:07.960
That's why I pack the sunscreen and the medications and

178
00:11:08.000 --> 00:11:12.080
the extra chargers and the snack bag that is specifically

179
00:11:12.240 --> 00:11:16.840
for the car, because every mile is worth it. Okay, Florid,

180
00:11:17.559 --> 00:11:20.799
let me paint you the picture. It's early. The truck

181
00:11:20.879 --> 00:11:24.120
is loaded. And when I say loaded, I need you

182
00:11:24.159 --> 00:11:27.759
to understand that I have been mentally packing this trip

183
00:11:27.799 --> 00:11:32.200
for two weeks. There are bags organized by person. There

184
00:11:32.240 --> 00:11:34.879
is a car bag that stays up front so nobody

185
00:11:34.879 --> 00:11:37.759
has to stop and dig through the luggage. There is

186
00:11:37.799 --> 00:11:41.720
a snack system. Jeremy loaded the truck. I reorganized it

187
00:11:41.759 --> 00:11:44.320
after he went inside. He doesn't need to know that

188
00:11:44.960 --> 00:11:48.440
we plotted the driveway and the energy in that vehicle

189
00:11:48.559 --> 00:11:52.120
is something. The little ones are wide awake and vibrating.

190
00:11:52.639 --> 00:11:56.159
They are excited. They are just not going to announce it.

191
00:11:56.879 --> 00:11:59.440
And I am up front with Jeremy, coffee in hand,

192
00:11:59.679 --> 00:12:03.320
going through my mental checklist one more time. Did I

193
00:12:03.360 --> 00:12:06.759
pack the thing, did I remember the other thing? Did

194
00:12:06.840 --> 00:12:09.480
I put the important thing in the right bag? And

195
00:12:09.519 --> 00:12:12.639
then somewhere around the edge of Springfield, I close the

196
00:12:12.679 --> 00:12:15.679
list in my head, I look out the window, and

197
00:12:15.759 --> 00:12:18.879
I let the trip begin. Missouri to Florida is a

198
00:12:19.080 --> 00:12:24.120
long drive. It's hours of highway that change slowly and beautifully.

199
00:12:24.840 --> 00:12:29.120
Tennessee Hills, Georgia. Pine's getting thicker and taller as you

200
00:12:29.200 --> 00:12:32.080
push south. And then the air that comes in through

201
00:12:32.120 --> 00:12:38.960
the cracked window starts to shift warmer, heavier, saltier, something

202
00:12:39.000 --> 00:12:42.679
in that your whole body recognizes before your brain names it.

203
00:12:43.559 --> 00:12:46.200
And then someone in the back says it, Mom, I

204
00:12:46.240 --> 00:12:50.600
see palm trees and it is on headphones, yanked off

205
00:12:51.159 --> 00:12:56.120
faces at every window. Where where is it? And it's

206
00:12:56.360 --> 00:12:58.399
just a tree on the side of a highway.

207
00:12:59.000 --> 00:13:02.919
But it means we made it. It means the ocean

208
00:13:03.039 --> 00:13:03.559
is close.

209
00:13:04.600 --> 00:13:08.200
In that moment, every single time we've done this drive,

210
00:13:09.039 --> 00:13:10.639
I will never stop loving it.

211
00:13:11.200 --> 00:13:12.720
Florida means the ocean.

212
00:13:13.320 --> 00:13:16.159
And there is nothing like watching a young child see

213
00:13:16.159 --> 00:13:19.799
the ocean for the first time. As a mother, that

214
00:13:19.879 --> 00:13:23.360
moment will reach into your chest and hold on the

215
00:13:23.399 --> 00:13:28.039
way they go still, all the noise just stops. This kid,

216
00:13:28.120 --> 00:13:31.039
who has been talking and asking and singing for two

217
00:13:31.279 --> 00:13:36.120
hundred miles suddenly has no words. They stand there and

218
00:13:36.240 --> 00:13:39.919
look out at all the water going all the way

219
00:13:39.960 --> 00:13:43.279
to the edge of everything, and their eyes go wide

220
00:13:44.080 --> 00:13:48.519
and they run. They always run, like the ocean called

221
00:13:48.519 --> 00:13:52.600
them by name. Florida is beach towels on every surface,

222
00:13:52.919 --> 00:13:57.679
and sandtracked through the rental and sunscreen that has be reapplied,

223
00:13:58.279 --> 00:14:03.399
whether anyone cooperates or not. It's someone getting a little too.

224
00:14:03.279 --> 00:14:04.639
Brave with the waves.

225
00:14:05.519 --> 00:14:08.759
It's late nights where the little ones can't wind down

226
00:14:08.960 --> 00:14:12.080
because they still can hear the ocean through the window.

227
00:14:12.759 --> 00:14:15.960
And I understand completely because I can hear it too.

228
00:14:16.720 --> 00:14:19.600
And somewhere in all of it, Jeremy and I find

229
00:14:19.639 --> 00:14:20.559
a quiet moment.

230
00:14:21.279 --> 00:14:22.679
Maybe it's early morning.

231
00:14:22.399 --> 00:14:26.840
Before anyone wakes up, when I slip outside with coffee

232
00:14:27.120 --> 00:14:30.440
and just stand there in the salt air. Maybe it's

233
00:14:30.480 --> 00:14:33.440
after the little ones go down and we sit somewhere

234
00:14:33.480 --> 00:14:36.720
and listen to the waves. But we find it. We

235
00:14:36.840 --> 00:14:41.200
protect those moments. They matter more than people know. Now

236
00:14:41.240 --> 00:14:44.759
here's where it gets interesting. We have a second trip

237
00:14:44.840 --> 00:14:49.279
blocked off on the calendar, committed to set aside, and

238
00:14:49.320 --> 00:14:50.480
we don't know where we're going.

239
00:14:51.320 --> 00:14:51.639
Now.

240
00:14:52.159 --> 00:14:55.399
The planner and me the list maker, and me the

241
00:14:55.480 --> 00:14:59.159
woman who has a color coded packing system. She had

242
00:14:59.200 --> 00:15:03.480
feelings about this. At first, my instinct was just figure

243
00:15:03.519 --> 00:15:06.720
it out now, pin it down, book it know what

244
00:15:06.759 --> 00:15:10.120
we're walking into. But Jeremy made a case for leaving

245
00:15:10.159 --> 00:15:13.039
it open. He said, what if we all decide together

246
00:15:13.480 --> 00:15:16.399
as a whole family closer to when we go? And

247
00:15:16.440 --> 00:15:19.240
the more I sat with that, the more I loved it.

248
00:15:19.679 --> 00:15:23.360
Because here's the truth about always having a plan. A

249
00:15:23.399 --> 00:15:27.639
plan is comfortable, but comfortable and memorable are not always

250
00:15:27.639 --> 00:15:31.320
the same thing. Maybe the second trip is the mountains,

251
00:15:32.039 --> 00:15:35.840
somewhere with cool air and altitude and a view that

252
00:15:35.919 --> 00:15:38.799
doesn't look real. Maybe the little one sees snow in

253
00:15:38.879 --> 00:15:43.039
July and their brain short circuit in the best possible way.

254
00:15:43.600 --> 00:15:46.360
Maybe it's a road trip with the direction but no

255
00:15:46.559 --> 00:15:50.519
fixed destination, where we just drive and stop when something

256
00:15:50.600 --> 00:15:53.519
looks worth stopping for. I want the kids to have

257
00:15:53.559 --> 00:15:55.399
a voice in this one. I want to sit around

258
00:15:55.480 --> 00:15:58.679
the table and put it to them. Here's what we've got,

259
00:15:59.200 --> 00:16:02.000
where do you want to go? Because when you give

260
00:16:02.080 --> 00:16:05.679
kids a real voice in a real decision, something shifts

261
00:16:05.679 --> 00:16:09.799
in them. The little ones will suggest something completely unhinged,

262
00:16:09.919 --> 00:16:12.679
and I'm here for it. The older boys will have

263
00:16:12.759 --> 00:16:15.919
done research nobody asks them to do, and they will

264
00:16:15.960 --> 00:16:18.960
have strong opinions, and I'll listen to all of it.

265
00:16:19.440 --> 00:16:23.320
I'll find the shape underneath everyone's version of what they want,

266
00:16:23.840 --> 00:16:27.320
and we'll land somewhere that actually works. That's part of

267
00:16:27.360 --> 00:16:31.120
what I do. Twenty plus years of motherhood teaches you

268
00:16:31.240 --> 00:16:33.759
how to hear what everyone is saying and find the

269
00:16:33.840 --> 00:16:37.440
solution that makes everybody feel seen. That is a skill,

270
00:16:37.639 --> 00:16:40.960
and I've earned it. The second trip is also about

271
00:16:41.000 --> 00:16:45.840
something we're teaching deliberately. The adventure doesn't require a perfect plan.

272
00:16:46.440 --> 00:16:50.600
It requires willingness, willingness to go even when you don't

273
00:16:50.639 --> 00:16:54.440
have every detail, willingness to figure it out as you

274
00:16:54.559 --> 00:16:58.480
move through it, willingness to laugh when something doesn't go

275
00:16:58.600 --> 00:17:02.840
the way you expect it. Our best family stories almost

276
00:17:02.960 --> 00:17:06.880
always start with something going sideways, the detour that turned

277
00:17:06.920 --> 00:17:09.799
into the best part, the wrong turn that led somewhere

278
00:17:10.039 --> 00:17:13.400
nobody planned on going that we weren't going to stop here,

279
00:17:13.839 --> 00:17:18.160
but it looks interesting. We want more of those. Let

280
00:17:18.160 --> 00:17:20.440
me give you the honest picture of summer in the

281
00:17:20.480 --> 00:17:24.759
hands and House, because I think people imagine something extreme

282
00:17:25.640 --> 00:17:30.559
when they hear thirteen kids in summer either a glowing

283
00:17:30.640 --> 00:17:37.160
movie montage or total disaster. The truth is both and neither,

284
00:17:37.920 --> 00:17:41.559
and something entirely its own thing. Summer in our house

285
00:17:41.640 --> 00:17:45.359
is loud. It is always loud, but the quality of

286
00:17:45.400 --> 00:17:49.920
the noise changes, and I've learned to hear a difference. School,

287
00:17:49.960 --> 00:17:54.119
your noise has stress underneath it. Someone has a project due,

288
00:17:54.279 --> 00:17:59.240
someone lost a permission, slipt. The schedule presses down on everyone.

289
00:17:59.839 --> 00:18:02.960
You could hear it in the house. Summer noise is different.

290
00:18:03.240 --> 00:18:06.920
It's fuller. There's laughter woven through it. There's kids who

291
00:18:06.960 --> 00:18:10.799
have nowhere to be just being. That sound is something

292
00:18:10.839 --> 00:18:14.480
I love deeply. We grill almost every evening when the

293
00:18:14.519 --> 00:18:19.559
weather holes. Jeremy runs the grill. That is genuinely his domain,

294
00:18:20.559 --> 00:18:24.440
and I respect it. I make everything that goes with it,

295
00:18:24.519 --> 00:18:28.160
the sides, the dessert, the thing nobody put on the

296
00:18:28.240 --> 00:18:33.200
request list, but everyone asks for thirds of There's something

297
00:18:33.240 --> 00:18:37.000
about sitting outside in the early evening, smelling whatever's on

298
00:18:37.079 --> 00:18:41.200
the grill, watching the kids scattered across the yard, hearing

299
00:18:41.279 --> 00:18:45.480
all those noises from a distance. That is as close

300
00:18:45.559 --> 00:18:49.640
to peace as life with this many children get, and

301
00:18:49.680 --> 00:18:53.039
I will take it every time we sit outside longer

302
00:18:53.720 --> 00:18:56.079
we let the little ones stay up past their normal

303
00:18:56.119 --> 00:18:59.000
bedtime because the sun is still out, and I am

304
00:18:59.079 --> 00:19:02.440
not going to argue with a summer evening. The grand

305
00:19:02.440 --> 00:19:05.480
babies run barefoot in the backyard, and I need to

306
00:19:05.519 --> 00:19:09.519
tell you something about that. Watching your grandchildren run barefoot

307
00:19:09.559 --> 00:19:12.640
in the same yard where your own children ran barefoot,

308
00:19:13.079 --> 00:19:16.079
it does something to you that doesn't fully have work.

309
00:19:17.079 --> 00:19:21.279
It's like watching time fold back in itself, like getting

310
00:19:21.319 --> 00:19:25.200
a glimpse of the whole picture at once, like seeing

311
00:19:25.240 --> 00:19:30.240
the beginning and the continuation at the same time. It

312
00:19:30.319 --> 00:19:33.200
fills me up in a way that is completely different

313
00:19:33.240 --> 00:19:36.119
from anything else in my life. The older boys drift

314
00:19:36.160 --> 00:19:39.160
in and out during summer. They have jobs, they have

315
00:19:39.200 --> 00:19:42.559
their own lives and friends and things they're building that

316
00:19:42.720 --> 00:19:47.480
is exactly right and exactly as it should be. But

317
00:19:47.680 --> 00:19:52.000
summer pulls them back more more dinners together, more evenings

318
00:19:52.119 --> 00:19:55.279
in the backyard, more moments where I glance over and

319
00:19:55.319 --> 00:19:59.960
one of the older boys is just naturally, without anyone asked,

320
00:20:00.880 --> 00:20:05.160
sitting with a younger sibling, paying attention to them, being

321
00:20:05.200 --> 00:20:09.200
there for them. And in those moments, I think we

322
00:20:09.279 --> 00:20:13.880
built that. Whatever else is complicated, whatever else is hard.

323
00:20:14.160 --> 00:20:15.839
We built that in them.

324
00:20:16.240 --> 00:20:18.200
They are going to take care of each other for

325
00:20:18.279 --> 00:20:21.079
the rest of their lives, and that is worth more

326
00:20:21.119 --> 00:20:26.000
than anything. Summer also costs money, and I won't pretend otherwise.

327
00:20:26.640 --> 00:20:29.960
Feeding and clothing and entertaining this family through the summer

328
00:20:30.000 --> 00:20:35.279
months takes real planning and real discipline. There is no shortcuts.

329
00:20:35.920 --> 00:20:39.720
But what I have truly learned, not just heard, but

330
00:20:39.799 --> 00:20:44.640
actually internalized, is that most important parts of summer almost

331
00:20:44.759 --> 00:20:48.039
never cost what you think they will. Late night fires

332
00:20:48.039 --> 00:20:51.359
in the backyard, movie nights where everyone piles onto the

333
00:20:51.400 --> 00:20:55.119
living room floor with every blanket in the house, ice

334
00:20:55.160 --> 00:20:58.519
cream runs at nine o'clock when the little ones should

335
00:20:58.519 --> 00:20:59.680
probably be in bed.

336
00:20:59.799 --> 00:21:02.599
But it's summer, and grace is real.

337
00:21:03.519 --> 00:21:08.200
These things cost almost nothing, and they are remembered just

338
00:21:08.240 --> 00:21:12.039
as deeply as any expensive trip. We try to give

339
00:21:12.079 --> 00:21:16.640
our kids both the Florida and the backyard fire, the

340
00:21:16.640 --> 00:21:20.720
big adventures and the ordinary Tuesday that somehow become a

341
00:21:20.799 --> 00:21:24.880
memory because life is built of both kinds of days.

342
00:21:25.680 --> 00:21:27.759
I want to spend some real time here because I

343
00:21:27.799 --> 00:21:30.680
think this matters, and I don't hear people talk about

344
00:21:30.680 --> 00:21:35.440
it enough. Travel is education, not in the bumper sticker sense,

345
00:21:36.039 --> 00:21:40.319
in the real practical, sometimes uncomfortable, always valuable.

346
00:21:40.440 --> 00:21:40.759
Sense.

347
00:21:41.240 --> 00:21:43.920
When you take a child somewhere new, you put them

348
00:21:43.960 --> 00:21:47.920
in situations their ordinary life doesn't create for them, and

349
00:21:47.960 --> 00:21:51.720
those situations teach things that I cannot teach them from

350
00:21:51.720 --> 00:21:56.240
inside our house. Travel teaches navigation. How to move through

351
00:21:56.240 --> 00:22:01.319
an airport the patients a security line requires the disorientation

352
00:22:01.599 --> 00:22:05.240
of a big terminal, the confidence of figuring out where

353
00:22:05.279 --> 00:22:07.559
you need to go when nobody is guiding you step

354
00:22:07.599 --> 00:22:10.519
by step. I watch my kids develop the skill in

355
00:22:10.640 --> 00:22:15.319
real time, and I think that's it, that confidence being

356
00:22:15.359 --> 00:22:19.519
built right there. Travel teaches money management. We get the

357
00:22:19.599 --> 00:22:24.799
kids spending budgets for the trip, not unlimited, a real number,

358
00:22:25.200 --> 00:22:29.039
their number to manage. And sometimes a child spends every

359
00:22:29.119 --> 00:22:31.720
dollar by day one and spends the rest of the

360
00:22:31.799 --> 00:22:35.599
week watching their siblings eat ice cream. That is a

361
00:22:35.640 --> 00:22:39.559
painful lesson. It is also a perfect one. I can

362
00:22:39.640 --> 00:22:44.119
explain budgeting forever. Nothing teaches it like running out. Travel

363
00:22:44.160 --> 00:22:48.039
teaches respect for places that don't belong to you. We

364
00:22:48.119 --> 00:22:51.680
talk about this before every single trip. We leave places

365
00:22:51.759 --> 00:22:54.440
the way we found them better if we can.

366
00:22:55.279 --> 00:22:56.359
The beach doesn't.

367
00:22:56.039 --> 00:22:58.880
Belong to us, The state park doesn't belong to us.

368
00:22:59.160 --> 00:23:02.880
The restaurant and the hotel and the rest stop are

369
00:23:02.920 --> 00:23:06.839
not ours. We are guests, and guests behave. According to

370
00:23:07.720 --> 00:23:12.519
travel teachers, trying new things new food is non negotiable

371
00:23:12.599 --> 00:23:17.400
in our family. You try it one reel bite, not

372
00:23:17.480 --> 00:23:21.319
a bird bite, not a fake bite, a real, genuine effort,

373
00:23:22.160 --> 00:23:25.359
and most of the time, not every time, but most

374
00:23:26.200 --> 00:23:30.160
they find something they actually like. And that moment when

375
00:23:30.200 --> 00:23:33.559
a kid who absolutely swore they would never touch something

376
00:23:34.079 --> 00:23:39.079
goes quiet and then quietly ask for more. That moment

377
00:23:39.160 --> 00:23:43.000
is small, but it opens a big door because what

378
00:23:43.039 --> 00:23:45.920
they actually learned has nothing to do with the food.

379
00:23:47.000 --> 00:23:52.000
They learned that unfamiliar is not automatically bad. The discomfort

380
00:23:52.119 --> 00:23:55.960
is not the same as danger. That trying is almost

381
00:23:56.200 --> 00:24:00.000
always worth it. I want that lesson woven into them

382
00:24:00.240 --> 00:24:06.160
before they're grown. Travel teaches patience. This one I enforced

383
00:24:06.279 --> 00:24:09.880
more than anyone else in the vehicle, and the irony

384
00:24:10.119 --> 00:24:14.079
of that is not lost on me. We set the

385
00:24:14.200 --> 00:24:18.119
expectation before every trip. Someone is going to be uncomfortable

386
00:24:18.160 --> 00:24:21.640
at the same point, someone is going to need something

387
00:24:21.839 --> 00:24:25.000
at a bad time. Someone is going to have a moment,

388
00:24:25.920 --> 00:24:29.759
and when that happens, we don't pile on. We help

389
00:24:30.400 --> 00:24:34.480
because that is what we do, and travel teaches gratitude.

390
00:24:34.519 --> 00:24:36.960
This is one I come back to the most because

391
00:24:36.960 --> 00:24:40.079
I think it matters most. Not everyone gets to see

392
00:24:40.079 --> 00:24:43.240
the ocean. Not every child gets to wake up somewhere

393
00:24:43.279 --> 00:24:46.359
new and feel the possibility of being somewhere they've never

394
00:24:46.400 --> 00:24:49.559
been before. Not every family gets to pile into a

395
00:24:49.640 --> 00:24:52.519
vehicle and just go. We remind our kids of that

396
00:24:52.960 --> 00:24:57.359
every trip. You are fortunate, and fortunate people have a

397
00:24:57.400 --> 00:25:02.279
responsibility to be grateful, actually notice the gift, to be

398
00:25:02.400 --> 00:25:07.200
present in it instead of sleepwalking through it. Let's be

399
00:25:07.240 --> 00:25:11.640
honest about something. Summer can test a marriage. I say

400
00:25:11.640 --> 00:25:15.599
this as someone who loves summer, loves her husband and

401
00:25:15.680 --> 00:25:18.720
has been building a life with him for over twenty

402
00:25:18.759 --> 00:25:23.559
two years. Summer can still test a marriage, not usually

403
00:25:23.599 --> 00:25:28.720
in big, dramatic ways, in the quiet, grinding, accumulating ways

404
00:25:29.240 --> 00:25:32.079
that you almost don't notice until you're already in it.

405
00:25:32.759 --> 00:25:36.880
The routine disappears, the rhythm you've built together through the

406
00:25:36.920 --> 00:25:41.559
school year, the morning schedule, the pickup routine, the weekly

407
00:25:42.039 --> 00:25:47.759
candice that gives structure to your days. All of it evaporates.

408
00:25:48.400 --> 00:25:53.519
Kids are homeworn. That means more needs more, noise, more

409
00:25:53.519 --> 00:25:57.359
demands on every ounce of energy both of you are carrying.

410
00:25:58.400 --> 00:26:01.720
The house gets messier faster, no matter how many times

411
00:26:01.759 --> 00:26:06.400
you address it. The grocery bill spikes, everyone wants something

412
00:26:06.599 --> 00:26:10.440
from you constantly, And in the middle of all of that,

413
00:26:11.319 --> 00:26:14.680
you and your husband are also supposed to be connected

414
00:26:14.759 --> 00:26:18.799
and communicating and choosing each other with patience and grace,

415
00:26:19.720 --> 00:26:22.559
which is hard. I'm not going to dress that up.

416
00:26:23.240 --> 00:26:26.759
It is genuinely hard. Jeremy and I have been together

417
00:26:27.000 --> 00:26:31.960
for over two decades. We've raised thirteen kids together, We've

418
00:26:31.960 --> 00:26:35.880
built businesses together. We've been through things that could have

419
00:26:36.200 --> 00:26:40.039
ended us and didn't. And what I know from living

420
00:26:40.200 --> 00:26:44.200
all of that is this, You do not survive a

421
00:26:44.279 --> 00:26:48.240
busy season by accident. You do not float into summer

422
00:26:48.599 --> 00:26:51.680
and hope for the best and come out in September

423
00:26:51.880 --> 00:26:55.839
closer than when you started. That is not how it works.

424
00:26:56.440 --> 00:26:59.759
What happens when you drift in. What happens when you

425
00:27:00.160 --> 00:27:07.880
rift is distance, slow, quiet, almost invisible distance where you're

426
00:27:07.880 --> 00:27:12.799
both exhausted, both pouring out and not finding time to refill,

427
00:27:13.640 --> 00:27:17.559
both giving everything to the kids and the house and

428
00:27:17.599 --> 00:27:21.200
the work, And one day you realize you've been living

429
00:27:21.359 --> 00:27:23.319
parallel lives.

430
00:27:22.920 --> 00:27:23.920
For three weeks.

431
00:27:24.559 --> 00:27:27.480
You're sharing a house and a schedule and a bed,

432
00:27:28.359 --> 00:27:31.839
but you haven't actually been present with each other. We've

433
00:27:31.880 --> 00:27:36.200
had that moment. I won't pretend otherwise. And what we've

434
00:27:36.279 --> 00:27:39.279
learned is that you don't wait to feel close before

435
00:27:39.319 --> 00:27:43.680
you act like it. You act first. The feeling follows

436
00:27:43.759 --> 00:27:47.119
the choice. We check in with each other on purpose,

437
00:27:47.920 --> 00:27:50.880
not to go over the logistics, not to figure out

438
00:27:50.960 --> 00:27:54.680
who's handling what, just to actually be there with each

439
00:27:54.680 --> 00:27:57.839
other for a few minutes, to say, I see you,

440
00:27:58.400 --> 00:28:00.920
I know this is a lot, I'm glad I'm in

441
00:28:00.960 --> 00:28:01.559
this with you.

442
00:28:02.440 --> 00:28:03.319
We laugh together.

443
00:28:04.279 --> 00:28:07.799
That sounds simple, but it is not a small thing

444
00:28:08.599 --> 00:28:12.720
when everything goes sideways, and on any given summer day

445
00:28:13.319 --> 00:28:18.680
with this family, something always goes sideways. Our ability to

446
00:28:18.759 --> 00:28:21.000
look at each other in the middle of it and

447
00:28:21.079 --> 00:28:24.960
find what's funny is something I protect because laughter between

448
00:28:25.000 --> 00:28:29.240
a husband and a wife is not avoidance, It is connection.

449
00:28:30.039 --> 00:28:32.799
It is saying this is hard and it is also

450
00:28:32.880 --> 00:28:35.920
kind of hilarious, and we are going to be okay.

451
00:28:36.559 --> 00:28:40.680
And we remind each other out loud regularly that this

452
00:28:40.759 --> 00:28:44.440
season will end one day. The house is going to

453
00:28:44.440 --> 00:28:49.480
be quiet, the charger arguments will stop. The cabinet doors

454
00:28:49.599 --> 00:28:53.000
that are always somehow left open will stay closed because

455
00:28:53.039 --> 00:28:55.720
nobody's here to leave them open. The shoes in the

456
00:28:55.759 --> 00:28:58.559
hallway will be gone, and we will miss the fullness

457
00:28:58.559 --> 00:29:02.039
of it being needed now, the noise that means life

458
00:29:02.119 --> 00:29:05.359
is happening right here. You're in the full season right now,

459
00:29:05.839 --> 00:29:08.119
and we are choosing each other in the middle of

460
00:29:08.200 --> 00:29:12.640
it on purpose every day, not because it's always easy,

461
00:29:13.200 --> 00:29:17.480
because it's always worth it. All Right, before we close,

462
00:29:17.799 --> 00:29:20.839
we do something different on the show. We bring something

463
00:29:20.880 --> 00:29:25.559
to the table literally, because food is memory too. Every

464
00:29:25.599 --> 00:29:30.160
summer has a flavor, a specific taste, that years later

465
00:29:30.400 --> 00:29:34.000
will pull you right back to the particular afternoon, a

466
00:29:34.039 --> 00:29:38.920
particular kitchen, a particular version of your family's life that

467
00:29:39.079 --> 00:29:43.079
you didn't realize you were storing away until it's already stored.

468
00:29:43.680 --> 00:29:46.319
This year, I want to share one we've been making

469
00:29:46.400 --> 00:29:51.000
in this house that the kids absolutely devour. Simple enough

470
00:29:51.039 --> 00:29:54.480
for a Tuesday evening, pretty enough to put in front

471
00:29:54.480 --> 00:29:58.160
of your company, cool enough for Missouri and July, which,

472
00:29:58.640 --> 00:30:02.880
if you've never experienced that, it's not playing around. This

473
00:30:02.920 --> 00:30:06.839
is our no baked summerberry cheesecake cups. And before anyone

474
00:30:06.920 --> 00:30:10.240
has an opinion about no bake, let me be clear.

475
00:30:10.759 --> 00:30:14.519
No bake is not taking a shortcut. No bake is wisdom.

476
00:30:14.799 --> 00:30:17.200
It is the choice of a woman who knows that

477
00:30:17.400 --> 00:30:21.599
heating up the kitchen in August is simply unnecessary when

478
00:30:21.599 --> 00:30:24.160
the result is just as good without the oven on.

479
00:30:24.759 --> 00:30:29.000
Here's what you need. Two cups of crushed bram crackers,

480
00:30:29.559 --> 00:30:33.200
half a cup of melted butter, one eight ounce package

481
00:30:33.240 --> 00:30:37.000
of cream cheese, and please let it actually come to

482
00:30:37.119 --> 00:30:37.960
room temperature.

483
00:30:38.319 --> 00:30:39.319
Do not skip this.

484
00:30:40.000 --> 00:30:43.680
Cold cream cheese will give you lumpy filling, and lumpy

485
00:30:43.680 --> 00:30:47.279
filling is a problem you could have avoided. Let it

486
00:30:47.319 --> 00:30:50.400
sit on the counter, be patient with it. Half a

487
00:30:50.440 --> 00:30:54.920
cup of powdered sugar, one teaspoon of vanilla extract, one

488
00:30:55.000 --> 00:30:59.839
tub of whipped topping, and fresh strawberries and blueberries. Now

489
00:31:00.160 --> 00:31:04.240
the assembly. Mix your gram crackers and melted butter together

490
00:31:04.440 --> 00:31:08.000
until it looks like damp sand. Press a layer into

491
00:31:08.079 --> 00:31:11.640
the bottom of each clear cup. We use mason jars

492
00:31:11.799 --> 00:31:15.559
in this house because they're pretty, they seal, and honestly,

493
00:31:15.720 --> 00:31:16.880
everything looks better in.

494
00:31:16.920 --> 00:31:19.400
A mason jar. That is just a fact.

495
00:31:19.799 --> 00:31:22.400
In a bolt and this is where I bring the

496
00:31:22.480 --> 00:31:26.400
kids in because this is their favorite part. Beat the

497
00:31:26.440 --> 00:31:30.640
softened cream cheese with the powdered sugar and vanilla until

498
00:31:30.680 --> 00:31:37.519
it's completely smooth, not mostly smooth, completely smooth. Take your time,

499
00:31:38.119 --> 00:31:43.440
then fold gently, fold, not stir, not be fold in

500
00:31:43.640 --> 00:31:49.680
the whipped topping, light airy, creamy spoon the filling over

501
00:31:49.759 --> 00:31:56.839
the crust, top with fresh fruit, strawberries, sliced thin blueberries, whole.

502
00:31:57.559 --> 00:32:02.720
Refrigerate for at least thirty minutes. An hour is better,

503
00:32:03.079 --> 00:32:08.039
two hours is perfect. The chill sets, the crust holds,

504
00:32:08.079 --> 00:32:12.440
the filling brings all the flavors together. What you end

505
00:32:12.519 --> 00:32:16.599
up with is cool and creamy and sweet and just

506
00:32:16.680 --> 00:32:20.519
a little tangy, and it is exactly right for a

507
00:32:20.599 --> 00:32:25.079
hot night. It looks impressive. It takes almost no effort.

508
00:32:25.680 --> 00:32:28.640
The kids made most of it, and they will tell

509
00:32:28.880 --> 00:32:32.359
everyone that they made it, and they did, and that

510
00:32:32.480 --> 00:32:35.160
is the point. This is the kind of recipe a

511
00:32:35.279 --> 00:32:38.359
child makes with you once and then asked to make

512
00:32:38.519 --> 00:32:42.279
every summer for the rest of their childhood, and someday

513
00:32:43.000 --> 00:32:46.319
they'll make it for their own families and it'll taste

514
00:32:46.359 --> 00:32:50.640
like this kitchen, like this house, like right now, and

515
00:32:50.680 --> 00:32:54.480
that's everything I want. To close with something rare, something

516
00:32:54.519 --> 00:32:57.359
I've been caring as we've been preparing for this season.

517
00:32:58.200 --> 00:33:02.240
This summer isn't just another I know how that sounds.

518
00:33:02.599 --> 00:33:05.079
I know it sounds like the kind of thing you say,

519
00:33:05.319 --> 00:33:07.759
but hear me out because I mean it in a

520
00:33:07.839 --> 00:33:12.000
specific way. Every summer is the last summer of something.

521
00:33:12.559 --> 00:33:16.160
Think about that. Every single one holds a version of

522
00:33:16.200 --> 00:33:19.039
your child that will never exist again. The way they

523
00:33:19.079 --> 00:33:23.160
are right now, the exact combination of age and curiosity

524
00:33:23.680 --> 00:33:27.839
and who they're becoming is unrepeatable. Next summer they'll be

525
00:33:27.880 --> 00:33:31.559
a little different, further along in becoming who they're going

526
00:33:31.599 --> 00:33:34.880
to be. And that's right, that's how it's supposed to work.

527
00:33:35.480 --> 00:33:38.599
But it means the summer, this specific one, is the

528
00:33:38.640 --> 00:33:42.039
only chance we get at this version of them. This

529
00:33:42.240 --> 00:33:45.039
is the last summer before some of the younger ones

530
00:33:45.079 --> 00:33:48.400
step into a new phase, before they stop needing certain

531
00:33:48.440 --> 00:33:51.559
things they still need today, the last summer before the

532
00:33:51.599 --> 00:33:54.799
grand babies get a year older and start running faster

533
00:33:54.880 --> 00:33:58.200
and needing less of what they need right now. Everything

534
00:33:58.279 --> 00:34:01.960
is always quietly become the last time. And I don't

535
00:34:02.039 --> 00:34:05.400
say that to make anyone sad. I say it because

536
00:34:05.920 --> 00:34:09.360
the alternative costs too much because one of the real

537
00:34:09.440 --> 00:34:13.639
losses in a busy life, and our life is genuinely busy,

538
00:34:14.199 --> 00:34:17.440
is looking back at a season you were physically there for,

539
00:34:17.920 --> 00:34:21.760
but emotionally somewhere else. You were at the beach, but

540
00:34:21.880 --> 00:34:24.440
you were on your phone. You were in a room,

541
00:34:24.599 --> 00:34:27.599
but you were somewhere else in your head. You were there,

542
00:34:28.039 --> 00:34:31.400
but you weren't really there. I've done that more times

543
00:34:31.440 --> 00:34:34.639
than I want to count, and every time afterward I

544
00:34:34.719 --> 00:34:37.800
felt the loss of it, quietly, the way you feel

545
00:34:37.840 --> 00:34:40.679
when you realize you miss something you can't go back to.

546
00:34:41.360 --> 00:34:43.719
I don't want that for the summer. I want to

547
00:34:43.760 --> 00:34:47.800
be present for the chaos, not just surviving it, though

548
00:34:47.880 --> 00:34:51.360
some days survival is genuinely the win, and I'm not

549
00:34:51.400 --> 00:34:55.800
pretending otherwise, not just managing it, choosing it, leaning into

550
00:34:55.840 --> 00:35:05.119
the loud, complicated, magnificent, leaning into the loud, complicated, magnificent

551
00:35:05.519 --> 00:35:09.719
fullness of it, and saying, this is my life, these

552
00:35:09.719 --> 00:35:13.199
are my people, this is what I prayed for, and

553
00:35:13.239 --> 00:35:16.119
I would not trade a single loud Tuesday for the

554
00:35:16.199 --> 00:35:19.920
quiet version. My older boys are growing up so fast,

555
00:35:19.960 --> 00:35:24.840
and it takes my breath away sometimes. Holland Tristan, Gavin

556
00:35:25.360 --> 00:35:31.280
Keenan Adam Logan. These boys I held in hospitals, These

557
00:35:31.320 --> 00:35:34.639
boys I stayed up nights with. These boys I watched

558
00:35:34.719 --> 00:35:38.280
learn how to walk and talk and become themselves their

559
00:35:38.320 --> 00:35:42.079
men know or becoming men. They're figuring out who they

560
00:35:42.119 --> 00:35:45.079
are in the world and what they want to build.

561
00:35:45.639 --> 00:35:49.039
And the seasons where we're all together, all close, all

562
00:35:49.079 --> 00:35:52.199
around the same table. That window is shorter than it

563
00:35:52.239 --> 00:35:56.519
looks when you're standing inside it. You think I have years,

564
00:35:57.119 --> 00:36:01.159
and then a summer passes and another, and you start

565
00:36:01.199 --> 00:36:05.800
counting them differently. The younger ones are watching everything. They

566
00:36:05.800 --> 00:36:08.960
are learning what family looks like from right here, from

567
00:36:08.960 --> 00:36:13.400
these summers, from these trips, from watching how mom and

568
00:36:13.480 --> 00:36:17.000
Dad treat each other when things get hard, from watching

569
00:36:17.000 --> 00:36:19.480
how the older siblings show up for the younger ones.

570
00:36:20.039 --> 00:36:22.559
From the dinners on the porch and the fires in

571
00:36:22.599 --> 00:36:25.800
the backyard, and the way the house feels on an

572
00:36:25.880 --> 00:36:29.519
ordinary Wednesday in July. Those are the archives they're building.

573
00:36:30.079 --> 00:36:33.840
And the grand babies, Lord, the grand babies, they are

574
00:36:33.920 --> 00:36:37.000
learning what love feels like before they even have words

575
00:36:37.039 --> 00:36:40.880
for it. They are learning that they are known and held,

576
00:36:41.320 --> 00:36:44.159
and that when they walk through our door. They belong

577
00:36:44.239 --> 00:36:48.400
here completely and without condition, and everything we do right

578
00:36:48.440 --> 00:36:50.239
now is writing.

579
00:36:49.840 --> 00:36:53.039
That into them. We don't know what next year looks like.

580
00:36:53.960 --> 00:36:57.760
Life has surprised us enough times that I hold plans

581
00:36:57.800 --> 00:37:02.519
with open hands now. Plan is a compass, not a contract.

582
00:37:03.119 --> 00:37:06.960
But we have this summer, this one is ours, and

583
00:37:07.039 --> 00:37:09.880
so we're going to take the trip. We are going

584
00:37:09.920 --> 00:37:12.920
to pack the truck and hit the road, even when

585
00:37:13.079 --> 00:37:16.920
the logistics feel impossible and the packing list is three

586
00:37:16.960 --> 00:37:20.599
pages long and someone still can't find their shoe at

587
00:37:20.599 --> 00:37:23.920
the moment we're supposed to leave. We are going to

588
00:37:24.039 --> 00:37:26.719
let the little ones stay up to watch the sunset

589
00:37:27.119 --> 00:37:29.519
from the beach. We are going to stand in the

590
00:37:29.519 --> 00:37:33.719
golf of America and feel the water hit our ankles

591
00:37:34.000 --> 00:37:37.039
and breathe in the salt to air and be genuinely,

592
00:37:37.079 --> 00:37:41.159
fully grateful. We are going to laugh when the GPS

593
00:37:41.199 --> 00:37:44.400
reroutes us for the fourth time. We are going to

594
00:37:44.440 --> 00:37:49.000
eat good food at strange hours in unexpected places. We

595
00:37:49.079 --> 00:37:51.679
are going to get something wrong on the trip and

596
00:37:51.760 --> 00:37:54.440
figure it out together. We are going to sing in

597
00:37:54.480 --> 00:37:57.159
the car. Jemmy and I are going to walk down

598
00:37:57.280 --> 00:38:01.440
that beach shoes in our hands, kids running in every

599
00:38:01.480 --> 00:38:04.159
direction ahead of us, and we are going to feel

600
00:38:04.159 --> 00:38:06.840
the full weight of this gift. And we are going

601
00:38:06.880 --> 00:38:10.079
to thank God for another summer, for this crew that

602
00:38:10.159 --> 00:38:13.480
he has given us, for the chaos that means we

603
00:38:13.519 --> 00:38:16.920
are alive and together, for the noise that means this

604
00:38:17.000 --> 00:38:21.239
house is full, for the complications that are proof this

605
00:38:21.440 --> 00:38:24.760
life is real. Summer is almost here. And if you've

606
00:38:24.800 --> 00:38:29.599
been listening today, wherever you are, whatever your family looks like,

607
00:38:30.239 --> 00:38:32.599
I want to leave you with something before you go.

608
00:38:33.360 --> 00:38:34.159
Plan something.

609
00:38:34.800 --> 00:38:37.800
It doesn't have to be expensive, doesn't have to be

610
00:38:37.880 --> 00:38:40.760
a week at the beach. It doesn't have to involve

611
00:38:40.920 --> 00:38:44.519
a three page packing list and a truck packed to

612
00:38:44.559 --> 00:38:48.679
the ceiling and the playlist that gets overruled forty five

613
00:38:48.719 --> 00:38:49.159
minutes in.

614
00:38:49.599 --> 00:38:51.360
It just has to be intentional.

615
00:38:51.880 --> 00:38:55.199
A picnic at the park, a late night ice cream

616
00:38:55.280 --> 00:38:59.079
run when everybody should technically be asleep, a weekend an

617
00:38:59.079 --> 00:39:01.920
hour from home, a day where you put your phone

618
00:39:01.960 --> 00:39:05.000
down and fully show up for the people right in

619
00:39:05.039 --> 00:39:09.199
front of you. Because your kids will not remember every gift,

620
00:39:09.440 --> 00:39:10.760
They will not remember the.

621
00:39:10.719 --> 00:39:13.199
Score of every game, they will.

622
00:39:13.000 --> 00:39:16.920
Not remember most of the individual weekday afternoons, but they

623
00:39:16.960 --> 00:39:19.920
will remember how it felt to pile into the car together.

624
00:39:20.440 --> 00:39:23.599
They'll remember the music. They'll remember the inside jokes that

625
00:39:23.679 --> 00:39:28.039
were born on a specific road trip that became family legend.

626
00:39:28.519 --> 00:39:31.280
They'll remember the way it felt when the palm trees

627
00:39:31.320 --> 00:39:34.679
started appearing and their mom reached back and squeezed their

628
00:39:34.679 --> 00:39:38.920
hand and said, we made They'll remember that their parents

629
00:39:38.920 --> 00:39:42.719
showed up, that their parents choose them, that their parents

630
00:39:42.760 --> 00:39:45.239
built a life that was worth remembering.

631
00:39:45.679 --> 00:39:46.599
That's the job.

632
00:39:47.000 --> 00:39:50.000
It's the hardest job and the best job, and the

633
00:39:50.039 --> 00:39:52.880
only job I would ever choose. This is we are

634
00:39:52.920 --> 00:39:58.960
the handsens where we believe that family, loud, imperfect, complicated,

635
00:39:59.400 --> 00:40:03.119
still figure faring it out full of love. Family is

636
00:40:03.159 --> 00:40:05.960
the greatest adventure of all. Thank you so much for

637
00:40:06.039 --> 00:40:10.039
spending time with me today. If this episode meant something

638
00:40:10.079 --> 00:40:13.039
to you, pass it to a family who needs to

639
00:40:13.079 --> 00:40:13.400
hear it.

640
00:40:13.719 --> 00:40:15.719
Leave us a review if you haven't yet.

641
00:40:15.960 --> 00:40:19.119
It helps more people find us, and that matters, and

642
00:40:19.199 --> 00:40:20.400
we will see you next time.

643
00:40:20.960 --> 00:40:22.000
Go plan something